Juniper is 7 months.

7 months

Let’s just let that sink in for a moment.

Seriously, people told me it would go by fast, but I guess I did not believe them.

In the last seven months I have gleaned some pearls of wisdom. Nuggets, if you will, of encouraging wisdom, spoken over me by trusted family and friends.

Are you ready?

1. Do what is best for your baby and family.

This advice almost made me cry when I heard it.

Here’s the story – Juniper loves to wake up at night. Her routine is as follows:

7pm Bedtime
12am First feeding
3am Second feeding
6am Third feeding

When we took June to her six month appointment the doctor told us that she did not really need that 3am feeding. She told us that Juniper would probably scream at us when we ignored her at 3am, but to stay strong and after about a week she should be sleeping right through it.

Ahem.

We tried. We really, really tried. But when Juniper would scream for 1-2 hours and we watched the first week come and then go without any change, well, we were exhausted. I also felt extremely defeated, especially because on top of the sleep issue she had a nasty diaper rash that would not go away. Changing her diaper, giving her a bath, changing clothes was a NIGHTMARE! Her little hands would swoop down to scratch every inch of her skin. I felt bad for her, but I also felt bad for me! How was I supposed to change her diaper while holding her hands down while feeling utterly exhausted?

Around this time, Lesta came to visit, and Forrest and I shared our woes. Her advice: do what is best for your family. If that means that what is best is bringing Juniper into bed at 3am to give her that feeding then DO IT.

So we did.

And we all slept so much better.

Then, of course, we had the night where Juniper woke up every hour after 12, so we went back to a modified version of crying it out at night. At the moment we’re back to the 12, 3, and 6 routine, and we’re doing pretty good. Then again, who knows what tonight will be like.

Which brings me to…

2. Forget about controlling a situation and thinking you have it all figured out.

As soon as I think we have something figured out, something happens to throw us off our groove. The sleep situation is a perfect example. One night she’ll sleep from 7pm-3am and then the next night she’ll be up every hour. I have relinquished the idea, wait… I am continually relinquishing the idea that I have figured out anything, and I am learning the art of flexibility.

3. No two babies are alike.

What works for one baby might not work for another. Similarly, I have learned, wait… I am continually learning to stop comparing Juniper’s development with other babies. While I could get worried that she hasn’t crawled yet, has no teeth, and still does not sleep through the night, I am not going to worry. I am going to be thankful that she is not into everything just yet, still has a heart melting gummy smile, and lets me cuddle her in the middle of the night.

Whew.

This parenting stuff is not for the weak-hearted.

And on that note…my little girl is just waking up from her nap, which is my cue to go. I’ll leave you with a lovely picture that gets me choked up every time I see it.

Love,
Libs

birders

ps: Juniper’s rash is all but gone. Turns out her skin was reacting to the detergent I was using for her cloth diapers. We’re still struggling with her excema, but it has gotten a lot better.

I have had a few people ask me how my makeup fast is going, so I thought I would share an update with all of you.

I have gone 21 days without makeup.

I am a little over half way done.

Hm.

Let’s be honest, do I feel more comfortable today, on day 21, than I did on day 1?

Yes.

and…

no.

Yes, because today I have only interacted with Forrest and Juniper, whereas on day 1 I was still working at the library and was nervous about a lot of “are you tired?” comments.

No, because I still really, really miss makeup.

Despite my desire to swipe some mascara on my pale eyelashes, I have had some thoughts about the use and purpose of makeup.

I think that makeup is a medium that we, as women, can hide behind.

Now, I don’t believe that is the sole purpose of makeup, but I think it is definitely part of it, at least for me.

When I used to put on makeup I could control how people perceived my well being. Putting on makeup tells the world, “I’m doing great! Look at how put together I am!”

When I don’t wear makeup I am presenting my true self, my vulnerability.

For instance, earlier this week Juniper went to bed earlier than normal but then woke up about 4 hours later. I fed her, she fell back asleep, but then proceeded to wake up every 1 to 2 hours after that. Miserable, miserable night. I think Francie is the only one who slept through it.

The next morning, I went to work (work for me right now is one morning a week at a software company where I help out with office work) and saw a few dear friends. I left feeling a little discouraged because I definitely did not look my best. My tired face had nothing to hide behind, and that made me feel sad and embarrassed.

As I write and reflect on that morning and those emotions I think, “Geez! It’s just makeup! People still like you for who you are!”

True, but do I like me? Embarrassing to admit, but true.

Sometime around puberty, most girls/women start to paint their faces and learn a new normal.

A new normal.

I have to wonder, if I do not wear any makeup what will strangers or possible employers think about my personality, ability, and competence based on the first thing they see – my face?

You might say, why should you care what strangers think about how you look?

Well, here is another for instance: I had a job interview last Monday for an On-Call Librarian position at the Clackamas Library. When I got the interview, I immediately wondered, makeup or no makeup? After a conversation with my sister-in-law about first impressions and societal norms, I decided to wear makeup for the interview but wash it off as soon as I got home. But I wonder, if I had gone sans makeup would I have presented the same professional impression, or would it have looked like I was not trying my very best? Who knows.

Maybe I am making too big a deal of this, but I am frustrated that making up our faces can hugely determine our success. It makes me wonder, why don’t men have to wear makeup? Why do women, at least some of us, feel like we have to? Why do we need or want to look a certain way, and who determines what the ‘certain way’ is?

Ahem.

All this to say, this commitment to go 40 days (not including Sundays) without makeup is a lot more exhausting, vulnerable, and discouraging than I thought it would be.

However.

It is also eye-opening, thought-provoking and a darn good thing for me to do.

I am thankful for the last 21 days and the next 19 days because I am still reminded daily about the reason for my sacrifice – small and silly though it may be. Even when life gets busy, any time I see my face I can remember the beauty of the gospel and the sacredness of this lenten season.

I am also thankful for these days because I am learning more about myself, and, more importantly, I am able to reflect on the message I want to share with Juniper someday about self-worth, makeup, and the beauty of a face that is au naturel.

Thanks for listening.

How is your lenten fast?

Love,
Libs

“The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mole, but true beauty in a Woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she knows.”

-Audrey Hepburn

“No matter how plain a woman may be, if truth and honesty are written across her face, she will be beautiful.”

-Eleanor Roosevelt

“but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”

-1 Peter 3:4

Lent. Forty days of remembrance. The remembrance of the forty days that Jesus spent fasting in the wilderness before the start of His ministry. It is a time to give something up, or add something new, in order to draw near to the Holy One and regain balance in our lives.

In the past I have given up Facebook, tv, or chocolate.

This year I gave up makeup.

makeup

Why makeup?

The simple answer, I want to step out of my comfort zone, embrace the face that God gave me, and spend time focusing on inner beauty instead.

The hard parts so far:

• Not feeling “ready” for the day. Makeup has a way of making me feel like I have made an effort to look nice and be productive. Not wearing makeup makes me feel like I have been in my pajamas all day and done nothing.
• Worrying that people are going to ask me if I am tired or sick. The curse of fair skin and light eyes!
• I don’t feel like I look like myself – how crazy is that?

The nice parts so far:

• Rubbing my eyes without fear of smudging makeup. Heaven.
• Extra time in the morning.
• My skin feels healthier.
• I don’t have to take eye make up off at the end of the day. I don’t know why I hate doing this so much, but there you have it.

I struggle with how superficial this all sounds, but the last seven days of no makeup have been good for me. When I see my unadorned face I can remember Lent. I can remember the sacrifice made on my behalf.

What about you? Do you observe Lent? Are you giving up (or adding) anything?

Love,
Libs

…and because I can’t post without sharing a picture of this girl, here you go:

Cutie

fyi: the date on the picture is way off. not sure how that happened.

Ever since the strip turned positive, I have been mildly obsessed with reading about motherhood.

One of the blogs I have added to my daily reading is Cup of Jo by Joanna Goddard, specifically her Motherhood column. I love reading about her experience as a first time mom. One of her posts that really resonated with me is titled: “Do your eyes light up when you see your child?”

In it, she writes that whenever she calls her mom, even to just talk about something mundane, her mom will act like that phone conversation is the best thing to happen to her all day. Joanna tries to show that same enthusiasm with her son, Toby, whenever he comes into a room. In fact, she does this so well that sometimes Toby, who is 2, will enter the room and say, “Ta-da!” Love that.

My parents have always done this really well. They always show me through their voice, facial expression and attention just how excited they are to talk to me. I love them for that.

Before reading this article, I already felt pretty strongly about showing Juniper how excited I am to see her, especially when I get her from a nap. I make my whole face light up and exclaim over how happy I am to see her and how much I missed her, which is actually true! In return, Juniper gives a lovely smile of her own and does that full body stretch that makes my heart melt every time.

There is something so beautiful about knowing that there is someone in your life who will always be over the moon to see you or talk to you. I believe it is the foundation to healthy self esteem. Which is why I want to give Juniper my undivided and over the moon attention whenever possible.

I mean, look at this face…

Love her

Love,
Libs

Being a mom is hard.

Specifically, the lack of sleep thing.

To be honest, it has really been getting me down these days.

While Juniper goes to sleep like a champ, she is still waking up several times a night to feed. Once she is fed she will usually go back to sleep pretty easily; however, I have a more difficult time. It is 3 am and my brain simply won’t shut off. I start to worry about this and that until I look at the clock and it is 4 am and then 5 am. And just when I have fallen back to sleep….you know the rest.

I don’t want to make a habit of whining to you, but I also don’t want to paint an unrealistic picture of my motherhood experience. It ain’t all roses and rainbows over here.

That is why something like a hearty muffin, a hot cup of coffee and an amazing fella who takes the baby for an hour or two in the morning so I can get a little more shut-eye is just the thing to make life okay again.

Mom’s Bran Muffin

My mom has been making these muffins for years, probably because they are easy to make, they make a ton, and they are really filling. Forrest requested them the other morning, and I was more than happy to oblige. They make a gallon (WHAT??) so you can either power through and bake the whole darn mix at once and freeze the muffins you don’t eat right away, or keep the mix in the fridge for a couple of weeks and make them fresh each morning, or every other morning, or whatever strikes your fancy.

My Nana wrote out the recipe for me when I got married. I love her handwriting!

Recipe

Here is the non-blurry version of the recipe:

Bran Muffins
Makes 1 gallon

1- 12oz box of Raisin Bran (Forrest does not like raisins, so I just use any bran cereal I can find. Trader Joe’s has a great one for $1.99!)
3 cups sugar
5 cups flour
5 tsp baking soda
2 tsp salt
4 eggs, beaten
1 cup vegetable oil
1 qt buttermilk

In a large bowl, mix together cereal, sugar, flour, soda and salt. To this mixture add eggs, oil and buttermilk. Mix well and cover.

Side note: Really make sure it is mixed well. The bran cereal I use has a lot of crevices so unincorporated flour/baking soda/salt can get stuck in there, which is not pleasant tasting. Trust me.

Store in refrigerator for 4-6 weeks. When you want to bake a few, spoon into greased muffin tins. Bake 15-20 minutes at 400 degrees.

You could also add frozen blueberries, nuts, bananas, or anything else that strikes your fancy. This is a very forgiving recipe, and it is fun to adapt depending on the season.

Enjoy!

Love,
Libs

Yesterday morning the American Library Association announced the Youth Media Awards for 2013.

Yeah!

I posted on Facebook that the Youth Media Awards equals Christmas for librarians. At least, it is like Christmas for this librarian.

This year, I was excited to introduce Juniper to the special event.

She was pretty riveted.

First Newbery

The Newbery committee chose three Honor books, which are as follows:

Splendors and Glooms by Laura Amy Schlitz

Splendors and Glooms

I actually thought this one was going to take the gold, but I am extremely happy it received an honor. This book is creepy and original with vivid characters, setting, and drama. It is rather long but so worth the time. As you can see from the cover, Ms. Schlitz is already a Newbery winner. She wrote, Good Masters! Sweet Ladies! Voices from a Medieval Village, which won the 2008 medal.

Bomb: The Race to Build – and Steal – the World’s Most Dangerous Weapon by Steve Sheinken

Bomb

I am not the greatest at finishing non fiction. I try, I do, but I do not always succeed. I started this one, and really, really enjoyed it, but did not finish it. I think I am going to have to give it a second go. Can you guess what bomb it is about? Really fascinating stuff.

Three Times Lucky by Sheila Turnage

Three Times Lucky

I really enjoyed this book. It is a quirky mystery, which, in my opinion, there is not enough of in the world…at least for a middle grade audience. I am glad this one made the honor list because it is fun, light-hearted and definitely a book I think kids will pick up and read.

And the gold goes to….

The One and Only Ivan by Katherine Applegate

The One and Only Ivan

Okay, so I am REALLY embarrassed by what I am about to admit to you…

I did not read this one.

My book club did, but when I saw it on the list for discussion and then saw the cover… I decided not to read it.

BAH!

Oh, judgmental soul!

I am sufficiently chagrined by my book cover snobbery, and I am currently number 8 of 50 holds at the library.

I’ll let you know what I think once I have read it.

In the meantime, what are you reading these days? What do you think of the Newbery choices this year? Was your favorite chosen?

Love,
Libs

Coming up: Bran muffin recipe of amazingness!

Yesterday I said goodbye to my twenties and hello to my thirties.

In other words, I went from this:

oh, the perm days

To this:

30

(Sorry the first picture is so small. It’s a scan, and I’m so old now that I don’t know how to do technologically savvy stuff like make pictures bigger.)

Yesterday was a lovely day. My family and friends made me feel oh so special, loved and celebrated. Forrest surprised me the night before with a “menu” that had 30 of my favorite things to do. I was to check ‘yes’ or ‘no’ for each item, thereby creating the perfect day. Seriously, this was the sweetest, most creative idea. When I asked him how he thought of it he said, I know you like check lists.

What a man.

So, the day began with a skype date with my parents, opening an amazing gift from amazing people, coffee, and donuts. Then a trip to the rhododendron garden to feed the ducks, pizza lunch at Oven and Shaker, and a night of pecan pie, homemade mac and cheese, and hanging out with three pretty wonderful people – Forrest, Annika & Juniper.

My heart feels full, especially when I reflect on the last ten years. A lot has happened. Since I love lists so much, here is a list of my twenties…

• I have lived in Colorado, Arizona and Oregon; however, I have lived in Oregon the longest. Even though I am not an Oregonian by birth, I love, love, love it here.
• I have completed a two-year program at Ravencrest Bible College, a Bachelors degree from Multnomah University and a Masters degree from Emporia State University.
• I have worked as a nanny, teachers aid, data-base specialist, bookseller and librarian.
• I have had my heart broken….but…
• I fell in love!
• I got married.
• I had a baby.
• I got pulled over for the first time for speeding (no ticket though!).
• I have been to Paris.
• I learned to knit.

The list could keep going, but the point is, I am one lucky girl. I am so thankful for the life I have been given, and I am so thankful for the people the Lord has placed in my life.

Thirty, at first, seemed a little scary. I mean, now I am really an adult. But instead of feeling fear at the reality of growing older, I am excited to see what comes next. I am tired of living in a state of fear and worry, and I am determined to fully embrace the life I’ve been given and live boldly.

So, here’s to thirty!

Love,
Libs

love him forever.

Unsure about the ducks

hi!

how are you?

I have lots to say.

I know I’m pretty cute

yep

cute as can be.

love.

Happy Friday, everyone!

Love,
Libs

Skeptical about tummy time

Seriously.

Are you sure about this, mom?

I just can’t help but take her picture.

Maybe it’s okay

Over…

Close up

and over…

Darling girl

and over again.

A different angle

I thought for sure she was going to roll over today.

Hair

She kept tipping over to one side or another.

So many dots!

But today was not the day.

Lovely girl.

She sure looked cute trying.

Look at those blue eyes!

I think she wore herself out.

Nap time?

This girl is too cute for words.

Tomorrow I will try and post some pictures of Juni hanging out with her stuffed friends.

Love,
Libs

I am a tad skeptical about New Year resolutions. Largely because, at least from personal experience, they are quickly forgotten and failed.

However, that reality is not stopping me from making a few resolutions this year.

I like to call the following my Book Resolutions of 2013.

Or, the Make-me-smarter Resolutions.

Or, For-goodness-sake-read-something-other-than-children’s-literature Resolutions.

Ha.

Like I’m ever going to stop reading children’s books.

Psh.

Okay, here they are:

• A poem a day: I have never really liked poetry, but I want to start. I am starting the year out with Dorothy Parker (love her), Robert Frost, G.K. Chesterton, and…I’d love your advice for more. Help a girl out!
• One classic. Only one? Well, I have a baby, a husband, a dog, and a typically long list of current children and young adult books to read. I figure if I have a goal to read one classic this year it will probably get done. Right? I am thinking Les Miserables because of the movie (I need/want to see it!), and I already own it. But, I am open to suggestions here as well. If you have a classic you think I MUST read, tell me!

Every once in awhile I’ll post the poem of the day so you can benefit from this resolution as well. In fact, I’m going to do that right now.

For your reading pleasure, here is Dorothy Parker in all her glory…

Ornithology for
Beginners

The bird that feeds from off my palm
Is sleek, affectionate, and calm,
But double, to me, is worth the thrush
A-flickering in the elder-bush.

That one was for Forrest.

Here is another:

Prayer
for a New Mother

The things she knew, let her forget again –
The voices in the sky, the fear, the cold,
The gaping shepherds, and the queer old men
Piling their clumsy gifts of foreign gold.

Let her have laughter with her little one;
Teach her the endless, tuneless songs to sing,
Grant her her right to whisper to her son
The foolish names one dare not call a king.

Keep from her dreams the rumble of a crowd,
The smell of rough-cut wood, the trail of red,
The thick and chilly whiteness of the shroud
That wraps the strange new body of the dead.

Ah, let her go, kind Lord, where mothers go
And boast his pretty words and ways, and plan
The proud and happy years that they shall know
Together, when her son is grown a man.

When I read that poem the first time I read it as a new mother myself, but when I read it a second time I realized who it is really written for/about. Wow.

Happy Wednesday!

Love,
Libs

PS: What are your resolutions?

This afternoon I was reading a few books to Juniper before her nap. I read to her pretty regularly (I mean, come on. Who am I if not a shameless reader?), and she usually regards the whole activity with mild attention.

However, this time Juniper flashed a HUGE smile while she looked at the little board book full of Winnie-the-Pooh characters, and not only that, but she did her whole body kick of excitement too.

Sigh.

Isn’t that just the loveliest thing? Watching her grow and develop is just the most amazing thing, and even though I often wonder how important it is to read to her now, I am reminded that it IS so, so important to read to her, talk to her, and engage with her as much as I can.

Happy Tuesday!

Love,
Libs & Juniper

3 month old baby!

Everyone told me it would go fast.

Hmm…what is that?

But I had no idea how true that would be.

I think I like looking at my feet better.

Now that Juniper is a whopping 3 months, here are a few of the things she loves:

• Smiling. I love this one! When she wakes up in the morning and sees either me or Forrest she flashes us the best smile, complete with a full body kick of excitement. This girl will smile at everyone – her doctor, people at church, family, friends, even Francie.
• Neck control. Gone are the days of a wobbly head. She loves holding her head up and taking in the world around her.
• Faces. One of our favorite books to read is “Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?” and the pages that hold her focus the longest have human faces on them. Our librarian, Jane, says that means she is social. I love that.
• Bath time. She has loved baths from the very beginning, especially because bath time is Juni and Daddy time. It’s pretty stinkin’ adorable.
• Talking. I love hearing and watching her figure out her voice. She always makes us laugh with the outrageous noises she makes. The best.

There are a few things we are still trying to figure out together. She is not the biggest fan of tummy time, which I think is pretty common, and afternoon naps have been a struggle. I am learning the balance of taking advice but going with my gut instinct, which is not easy.

For three months we have had the privilege of hugging, snuggling, kissing, playing, and soothing the most precious baby I have ever met.

I’m not biased or anything.

Seriously, I love being Juniper’s mom. It can be hard and exhausting but it is also the best job I have ever had. I actually love that my shoulders normally have drool on them and sometimes I have spit up in my hair. I love the smiles, the occasional belly laugh, and the baby babbles. These days feel so fleeting and so beautiful, and I am trying to soak it up as much as I can.

love.

Love,
Libs
 

I love being home, especially now that Juni and I are establishing a routine.

(who knew I would get excited about things like actually having time to clean the house and organize the paperwork?)

However, there are moments when I get really lonely and long for adult company and conversation.

(When it’s just me and June I tend to say one word over and over – hi. See the video at the end of this post for proof.)

Thankfully, Forrest had the last two days off and I LOVED having him around.

And not just because he made me a pecan pie.

It’s not like I’m trying to lose weight or anything, right?

Our ‘weekend’ included plenty of:

• Early morning family snuggles, coffee, and 101 Dalmations
• Chinese food that tasted great but gave us horrible headaches (thanks MSG)
• Walks to the library
• Reading Grace Lin’s newest, “Starry River of the Sky” to each other
• Acting silly and ridiculous to get the baby to smile and coo – amazing.

When it is just me and Juniper hanging out I go by her schedule. She lets me know when she is ready to eat or nap or have her diaper changed. It is working out pretty well…except for the nights where she really doesn’t want to sleep and I really do want to sleep.

I love the sleepy cuddle time, but I also love when she is happy and alert after a feeding. We stare at each other and I make all kinds of ridiculous high-pitched sounds to get her to smile or coo. I love that she is waking up more and more and showing us her sweet personality. She still has at least one or two really grumpy sessions a day, but her smiles get me through.

Also, this girl has the craziest hair in the world. When she was born it was so dark, but it is steadily getting lighter and wavier. I love how the top of her hair always sticks up.

Now, when Juniper is napping or sitting contentedly in her swing I like to putter about the house, read, put movies on, and putter about the internet.

It’s rather lovely.

For instance, I love setting small, attainable goals each day. Like, clean off the dining room table (how does it get SO cluttered???), file paperwork, clean the bathroom, vacuum the downstairs, etc. I am so thankful for the time and ability to organize and clean my home. It kind of feels like a luxury.

I have been reading the Inspector Gamache series by Louise Penny and I am in love. They are exactly the kind of mystery I like – cozy & thought provoking. I just finished book 4 of the series and I gasped out loud when the murderer was revealed. She fools me every time!

I have been watching Harry Potter movies, Pride & Prejudice (BBC version, of course), Dick Van Dyke (oldie but a goody), Project Runway, and New Girl. Most of the time the tv is on while I am puttering.

Oh the internet. Facebook is such a time waster, and I am trying to spend time doing other things instead of becoming a Facebook zombie. I am also in love with Goodreads. Here is my profile. Are we friends?

Well, that is what is happening around here. Not terribly exciting, but lovely all the same.

Now, enjoy this cuteness:

Love,
Libs

I can hardly believe it has been one month since this precious girl made her grand entrance.

Even though I am just a little tired (“little” actually means a lot), and even though life has been a roller coaster of emotions, healing and change, I couldn’t be more grateful and overwhelmed by the gift that is Juniper Elizabeth Johnson.

Soon after Juniper was born I started to mentally compose her birth story to share with you. However, since I have been home and had a little more time to really reflect over that experience I have decided not to share it.

Gasp.

The reason(s) for this:

The process of giving birth is vulnerable and private. Granted, it wasn’t so private with a room full of doctors, nurses, a fantastic mid wife, parents, sisters, doula and spouse, but let me tell you that when you’re in that moment the only thing you are focused on is that baby. Everyone and everything else was kind of muted for me as I labored to bring Juniper out into the world. It was very, very surreal.

The process of giving birth is beautiful and should be shared…but the thing is, I want to choose who I share it with. Selfish? Maybe. But this experience has reminded me that not everything needs to be shared and that is okay.

Now, I love reading birth stories, so I feel kind of bad withholding my own. However, chances are, if I know you I want to share it with you. I just don’t want to publish it for the whole world to read.

(Oh, didn’t you know the whole world reads this blog?)

(smile)

I’ll just say this about the labor experience: the Lord blessed me with a relatively short labor and He surrounded me with the best people in the whole world to encourage and support me through. In fact, He has continued to bless me with people who have given of their time, kitchens, and arms to walk with me through something that is both terrifying and wonderful in its newness.

So…can we still be friends? I promise to share all kinds of Juniper pictures and stories in the future. In fact, I’m totally going to over-share in that department, trust me.

Juniper, I’m so glad you came on October 1st, and I am thankful for every moment I get to spend with you…even the sleepy ones. You are one in a million and I love being your momma. Keep the smiles coming…you have no idea how much they mean.

Love,
Mom

Week 36

Can you even believe it?

36 weeks

Highlights of week 36 so far:

• We had an ultrasound this week and baby is head down.

Baby, please stay that way, okay?

Thanks!

• We also got to see the baby find his/her thumb and start sucking on it, which was pretty heart melting for this momma and daddy.

• The house is getting more and more organized (thanks to my crazy nesting hormones) and baby’s ‘corner’ is starting to come together. At some point this weekend I plan on making a modified version of this mobile. I’ll post pictures when it’s done.

• We received the car seat in the mail this week!

Thanks Mom and Dad!!

• We also received a few of the diapers we registered for. We have decided to go the cloth diaper route and we are so thankful any time someone decides to send us one.

Week 35

35 weeks

Highlights of week 35:

• Mom visit!! I am so thankful for the week that my mom was here. We ran errands, ate good food, watched a lot of Project Runway, and had several heart to hearts. It was hard to see her leave, but she’ll be back as soon as this baby decides to come!

• Baby shower! Thank you to those who came to my baby shower! I feel so blessed by all of the diapers, clothes, blankets, and love that have been heaped on me and this baby.

• Graduation! Thank you to those who came to watch me get ‘hooded.’ Again, I am so blessed by the people in my life!

• Lesta, Christina and Annika came for a short visit! It was so good to see them and watch them get excited about the baby visibly moving around.

Before I move on to week 34, here are some precious Francie gems:

gem

She had me laughing so hard in this next one. She loves relaxing in the sun.

First born

Oh, how much our lives are about to change.

Week 34

34 weeks

Highlights of week 34:

• Celebration of 34 weeks with baby Juniper or baby Arthur.

Baby, I have loved these months where I get you all to myself, but I am starting to feel impatient for you to join the outside world. I can’t wait to hug your little body and kiss your sweet face. 

• Celebration of 4 years with my love.

Forrest, I can hardly believe that it has already been 4 years. I am so thankful you are my husband and friend.

love

You are my hero.
Love,
Libs

I have been pregnant for 33 weeks.

On the one hand, where has the time gone?

On the other hand, guys! I was pregnant on New Year’s Day.

Wow.

That is some significant time.

I have about 7 weeks left (right?), and I am praying (and hoping) that baby waits to come until he/she is healthy, strong, and ready to join us on the outside.

I have had a few baby showers (and been really, really bad about photographing the events), but I have been so blessed by the  abundance of baby clothes, diapers, and other necessities.

Initially, Forrest and I decided not to buy a dresser or changing table; rather, we were going to make room for baby with the space we have available. Then…we realized it might be nice to have a place to put all of baby’s stuff without having to get rid of/stress about de-cluttering our own space. We found a dresser on craigslist for a bargain and I LOVE it. It will double as a changing table on the top, once we get a changing pad.

Dresser of happiness

The picture shows it as a darker yellow than it is. Think soft yellow.

love

I washed all of the baby clothes we have received so far, and there is a definite pattern of yellow, polka dots, stripes and giraffes.

LOVE.

Also, there is something about taking those tiny, perfect little clothes off the hanger, clipping off the tags, washing them and putting them in the drawer that makes this baby’s arrival so real. The clothes go from being, “aw, cute!” to, “this belongs to my baby.”

WEIRD!

Wonderful.

We’ve also decided to go the cloth diaper route, and we received the first of many (I hope) at the last shower.

 
The pattern on this one is smarty-pants math. Maybe it will make the baby smarter??

Finally, because I know this is really why you read this blog, here is a picture of me and baby at a glorious 33 weeks.

Thanks for reading.

Love,

Libs

30 weeks

On Monday, Forrest and I drove to Silver Falls for a little hiking adventure.

It was beautiful, and it was so nice to spend some uninterrupted time with this fella…

Love

I will say this about hiking, despite the beauty of nature, I think I get tired a lot quicker these days. Is it any wonder when I’m carting around an extra person?

However, Forrest is the best encourager in the world.

“You can do it!”

“Almost there!”

I think he is going to be a pretty spectacular labor coach when the time comes, don’t you?

At one point, we were able to walk behind the waterfall you saw in the first picture.

Beautiful.

Pregnancy update:

So far, baby and mom are doing great. I had a doctor appointment on Monday, and it was one of the best appointments I have had so far.

First of all, getting my blood pressure taken is always an ordeal. I’m always so stressed out by the hospital environment, and the numbers always reflect that. This time, my favorite nurse was on duty (yes!) and she let me sit in the exam room for a few minutes before taking my blood pressure. Then, I focused on my breathing, and my b.p. was the best it has been.

Yes!

Midwife, husband, and everyone involved were extremely happy.

Then we talked to our midwife about some labor stuff, and it was all so positive.

I was worried about not being able to eat during labor, but my midwife said that as long as baby’s heart rate is good I can definitely eat!

Huzzah!

I would like to be able to sit in a tub in order to relax during labor, and Kaiser has two tubs and virtually no waiting to use them.

Huzzah again!

Then, I really want the baby to be put directly on me as soon as he/she makes his/her entrance, but I had heard that some hospitals take the baby right away to do whatever they need to do. But, my midwife said that as soon as baby comes out, he/she will be placed on my belly and Forrest can announce the gender.

Huzzah again… again!

Anyway, it was all so encouraging, and it made me feel more confident about a hospital birth and thankful that I will have a midwife.

(I’m purposefully leaving out some other “huzzah” moments so that some of my readers will not be grossed out and then be forever horrified by my blog. If you are interested in those “huzzahs” let me know and I’ll message you!)

Now, I am focusing on my final two weeks of grad school (say what??) and nesting and reading and crocheting.

Also, I have my first shower tomorrow afternoon, and I feel blessed beyond measure by my church family for celebrating baby’s life with me.

I’ll post pictures and stories about it next week.

Love,

29 weeks

This morning I ran into some old friends at the store, and they asked how I was feeling.

My response was -

“good! a little overwhelmed.”

I walked away from that interaction puzzling why one of my first responses was on the negative side.

Am I overwhelmed by the reality of entering motherhood? The reality that as soon as baby makes his/her entrance into the world I can no longer call my life my own? The reality that I won’t get a full nights sleep again for who knows how long? The reality that money is going to be tight, especially if I get to stay home, and we’ll have to start sacrificing in painful ways?

Overwhelmed?

Yes.

But…

I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I have wanted to be a mother since I was old enough to rock a baby doll.

I have never really been able to call my life my own. You know, that whole Christian/being married/being a friend/daughter/etc/etc thing.

Sleep – it is overrated??

Who cares if we don’t get to eat out or buy fancy latte’s.

We’re having a baby, and honestly, I couldn’t be happier about it.

Our family is growing from two to three (or four if you count grumpy pants Fran), and I think we’ll be the better for it.

So, the next time someone asks me how I am feeling, I hope I answer -

“Couldn’t be better.”

Because it is true.

Oh baby, we cannot wait to meet you! Keep kicking and cooking in your mamma, and come on out when the time is right for you.

We’re so glad you are coming.

Love,
mom

July is usually the time when summer finally comes to stay.

The jury is still out on whether that will be the case for 2012; however, today has been beautiful, sunny, and a perfect 70 degrees.

Summer makes me think of berries, especially the ones that come from my very own yard.

It makes me think of hamburgers on the grill and homemade hamburger buns.

I am pretty excited to try these out tonight. I used a recipe from here, and it was SO easy, which is exactly what a pregnant-trying-to-finish-grad-school-girl likes to hear.

Oh yeah, and then there is this…

We have officially transitioned into the 3rd trimester!

And Fran could care less.

I’m not sure if the ruler is supposed to convey how big I am going to get (oh gosh), or just how far I’ve come (again, oh gosh). In any case, I love that all four members of the Johnson family are present and accounted for.

We are getting more and more excited to meet this little person, and I can’t stop wondering what he/she will look like.

Pregnancy has not been without its ups and downs. Last week I went in for my glucose test and flunked it.

(I really hate these tests where I can’t study and prepare.)

So, my doctor told me I had to endure the three hour glucose test.

For those who are not familiar, for the three hour test you have to fast for ten hours prior. Then you go in and the nice phlebotomist takes your fasting blood. Thirty minutes later they give you twice the concentration of glucose that was administered during the first test and you guzzle that in five minutes. Just try to imagine a really, really sweet Sprite without the carbonation.

Yuck-o.

Then they take your blood at one hour…

…two hours…

and three hours.

Oh yeah, and even though you feel nauseated from the sugar coma, they tell you that if you throw up you’ll just have to take the test over again another time.

Great.

Thankfully, I did not chuck my non-existent cookies.

Plus also, I passed!!

Bring on the cookies and ice cream!!

(just kidding)

(sort of)

So far, baby and mamma are healthy and co-existing nicely. Except when baby uses mamma’s bladder as a trampoline during a hike and mamma has to consider whether it is worth it to squat along the side of the trail even though there are tons of people around.

Oh the dignity that is pregnancy!

I hope you are all enjoying a happy and safe 4th!

Love,
your very pregnant friend, who is only going to get larger in the coming three months.

Amen.