When you meet an unagented writer socially (i.e., not because they've scheduled time with you at a conference), do you expect them to talk about their novel? (1) Are you waiting for them to initiate that conversation? (2)  If they keep the conversation casual, are they missing an opportunity to talk about their work to you? (3) In other words, how do YOU like writers to approach you? (4)  Not that you're a benchmark for all agents, but you're the only agent in the room talking at the moment. 

(1) NO.
(2) NO
(3) NO
(4) With whisky and chocolate. Preferably with glasses, and napkins, and enough for the both of us.


I will be at several upcoming conferences*** in the next few months so this is a very timely question.

I fully understand that many people are absolutely tongue tied when meeting an agent in an unexpected spot. If we're alone in the elevator and I'm not just knackered to the point of incoherence, I generally will try to ask a general question like "are you having a good conference?" or "I see you're from Carkoon. Has anyone seen Colin there lately?"

Notice neither of those are about your book. And generally they're things you can answer pretty easily.

If you get off the elevator and kick yourself for "missing your chance" stop kicking. There's no way you can pitch your book in that moment and have me ever want to read it, or want to interact with you further, cause pitching in that moment means you're tone deaf. And by tone deaf, I mean oblivious to the situation you're in and just hell bent on getting what YOU want.  That's NOT a quality I look for in a client. Tenacity and focus are important; knowing how to be around people is equally important.

If you meet an agent in the elevator, you can use those exact same questions to initiate conversation: "Are you having a good conference?"  "I see you're from New York; has the weather warmed up yet?"

General small talk conversational gambits.

THEN, if you want to use that moment to your advantage, you WRITE me a query that says "I met you briefly in the elevator at the Summer Synopsis Camp on Carkoon and we talked about the weather in NYC."

That helps me remember you and reminds me that you are clued in about how to talk to people, and when NOT to push your book.

If someone comes up to me in a social situation and says "Can I pitch you my book" I've always wanted to say "Sure go ahead" and let them ramble on. When they finally stop, I want to say "no, that doesn't seem very well written" so they will huff and puff and say "but you haven't even read it!" to which I can reply "exactly. I need to see the writing. Send me a damn written query."

I've never been able to bring myself to do that in all these years, but man oh man I want to.

What I generally say is "I'd prefer you didn't, but please feel free to send a written query." At least half the time, people start pitching anyway.

I've made other people wear my name tag at parties to avoid this kind of thing. I've hidden behind friends to avoid this kind of thing.

I hate this kind of thing.

I mean seriously hate hate hate it.  The reason is I KNOW I am curt and dismissive and brutal in real life. (Please don't everyone pile on here to deny it; trust me, I'm self-aware)  I simply can NOT reply in the kindlier way I can on paper.  I try very hard to avoid being put in these situations, but when it's unavoidable the only person who hates this more than you is ME.

My slithery colleague Barbara Poelle is masterful at in person pitching moments like this. She's forthright without being brutal, and often very helpful. It's the only reason I stand next to her at parties (well, that and she knows the shortest route to the bar.) But even Barbara HATES this kind of in person pitching. (You'd never know it to talk to her, but she does.)
 

On the other hand, if at some point during a conference I do ask about your novel, you know to Be Ready, right?




***
ThrillerFest/CraftFest
Midwest Writers Conference in Muncie Indiana
Writers Digest Pitch Slam
Bouchercon
CrimeBake

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To celebrate the publication of THE LONG RIDE HOME by Kari Dell, we had a writing contest. Herewith the results:


Special recognition for lovely lovely images
S.D.King 10:16am


A phrase I am determined to find many future uses for
“Go ride the baloney pony!” 
Kregger 10:17am

Special recogniton for excellent use of prompt words

dell/bordello Kitty 10:23am

ride/iridescent brianrschwarz 12:02pm

dell/yodelling Amy Schaefer 4:48pm

home/psychometry Steve Forti 5:42pm

long/Longfellow's Phyllis E 5:13pm



Grease is the word!
Colin Smith 10:36am



Not quite a story, but holy moly
CarolynWith2Ns 11:17am
Christine Seine 11:55am



It's says NOTHING good about me that I laughed like crazy reading this one 
Amanda Capper 11:17am
Lance 11:23am



And of course, Carkoon now appears in these stories!
Angie Brooksby-Arcangioli 1:14pm



Special recognition for a story that would have been perfect if the last line got chopped.
Donnaeve 1:27pm

Dellwood Acres top child psychiatrist, Dr. Grate, glared at the young boy, “You ride him, you don’t converse with him. Keep that up and it’ll be a long time before you go home.”

The horse in the stall tossed its head.

Dr. Grate persisted, “Say it. Horses don’t talk.”

The boy, as usual, refused to speak directly to the doctor.

A voice came from the stall, “Of course, of course!”

Dr. Grate spun around, “Who said that?”

The boy, his face brightening, whispered, “See?”

Outside the barn, Doctor Grate’s assistant high-fived himself. His secret Mr. Ed routine worked every time.

And here are the nine finalists:


(1) Julie Weathers 11:34am

"I'll bring him home, little mama," I said. Then Dell and I rode off to war. She lost the baby while we were dealing death at Chicamauga. He was determined to go home to her, but I convinced him to stay. He'd be alive today if I'd let him. When he fell, she wrote and made me promise to bring him home. Like a fool, I did. Now I'm making that long ride home with his horse trailing behind that lead coffin. She'll have a husband to mourn, but be damned if I know whose he is.







(2) Geoff LaPard 4:40pm

Cruz stood back. The remodelling had worked perfectly. It had taken a long time, each brick, each joist requiring care. He allowed himself a small glow of pride.

He spent a few hours installing the furniture - the table his mother left him when she left; the horsehair sofa from his grandmother when his father disappeared; the bed in which his beloved Natalie had died.

He waited for Maisie to appear, as usual skipping - their secret, her daily cookie.

When he bolted the steel doors, designed to muffle her scream he whispered to the cold metal. ‘Quiet. You’re home now.’



(3) Amy Schaefer 4:48pm

Darla jolted awake like she had been unhorsed. She shuffled to the window and scowled. Damn neighbors and their strident yodelling. Waking an old woman in the dead of night.

Those hooligans needed a good scare, and no mistake. She fumbled her box of shotgun shells; they scattered with a sound like hail.

The door flew open. “Mama,” said Cliff. “I know the singalongs get rowdy, but this is summer camp. You can’t shoot buckshot at homesick nine-year-olds.”

She played contrite as he tucked the covers around her chin.

Then, alone in the dark, Darla grabbed the shell he’d missed.





(4) Lisa Bodenheim 6:42pm

The car tires hummed a strident refrain, ‘She’s seeing someone else, she’s seeing someone else.’ How ironic, now that gay marriage was legal. It felt like a knife to the heart.



In the backseat, the kids were zonked out after a frenetic day at the Wisconsin Dells Kalahari Waterpark. I focused on the freeway, steeling my nerves as I drove home.



That night, alone with her in the kitchen, my heart pattered like a mad hatter. “Sheila, let’s quit this horse—”



She knelt on her knees, tears of longing in her eyes, and a small box on her palm.





(5) Timothy Lowe 7:43pm

The bride threw up in her hands.

"It was a horse pill," the bride's mother whispered to an aunt.

"I can marry whomever I choose," she spat, wiping puke from her lips.

Not true. They'd found her yodelling in an alley the night before, drunk as a skunk. The pill had sobered her but made her sick.

"You belong with me," the groom said. He was a ratty little man in a monkey suit. He was also the only one who knew her sister's whereabouts.

"Shall we begin?" said the priest.

The bride swallowed her bile. She took his hand.



(6) Calorie Bombshell 8:26pm

Bride-to-be Ursula Langston Cordially Requests Your Presence.

Hand-delivered on linen paper. Name rings a bell but I can’t place her. Former co-worker? Googled address. Beverly Hills. “No gifts, please.” Classy.

I’m here. Gorgeous home. Which one’s Ursula? Face is familiar. Mannequin smile. But from where?
Headlong dash to buffet table. Mortadella and provolone pinwheels. Mouth stings of horseradish. Deathly allergic. Spit it out. Throat swelling. Mouths move as I stumble.

Remember now? Tenth grade. Ursula’s sister, Becca. Suicide. You tormented her. All of us.

I’ll tell them sorry. Beg their forgiveness. If I can just make it. to. the. door.



(7) Nadine 11:59pm

“He’s been gone a long time.” She held her handkerchief. “I think he’s met someone else. I heard he was seen in the woods with a girl.”
“Don’t think about that. You’re better off without him.”
She stood up. “Maybe he needs a ride back. I should go get him.”
“I wouldn’t bother if I were you.”
“Why?”
“He’s not coming home. He doesn’t love you.”
She glared at me. “Screw you and the horse you rode in on.”
“That’s just the thing,” I said. “He did. I was the girl in the dell.”



(8) A Velez 6:44am

She scrambles into the mill loft. The horse should be clear by now, she thinks. The children safe.

The loft is crammed with grain. No weapon. No escape. She shoves the barrels and they fall longwise like dominoes – flour explodes into air, denser than fog.

“It’s simple Della,” he emerges in the iridescence. “Sign over the homestead, you live.”

“No. I won’t.” And neither will you.

He raises the gun. A white apparition with a red, lying mouth.

He is already a ghost.

Flint to frizzen. A single spark. The glutted air ignites.

The explosion rages across the prairie.



(9) Pharosian 9:58am

"Howdy, ma'am," he said in perfect hayseed. He had that whole farmer-in-the-dell look going on, what with the overalls and straw hat.

"Let me show you where to bring the dining suite," I said, ushering him into my home.

He glanced around, presumably gauging dimensions. "Huh," he said, wiping his horsey face with a bandanna. "Never seen a chaise longue in a dining room before." He pronounced it "shayze lounge."

"It's 'shez long,' I said. I take pride in educating others.

"Smart lady." He nodded toward the wall. "So you know that Ver Meer is a fake?"

I stared.





I had to read all of these several times to make a final choice. I really loved what you all did with these prompt words.

The winner this week is Congratulations Calorie Bombshell.  A funny, yet twisted story with enough ambiguity at the end to really grab us!

Calorie Bombshell you'll email your mailing address to me, I'll send you a copy of The Long Ride Home by Kari Dell. If by some chance you have it already, let me know and we'll figure out something else.

Thanks to all of you who entered. As usual, I loved reading your work. Some of you are very very scary! (Just the way I like it!)

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It was lovely to come back on Monday and get back to work. Our topic was sex scenes in non-romance novels.

"There is nothing wrong with sex but I'd rather have it then read about it. The best sex in a book happens between chapters. The lead up to it and the after is more important than the actual act."

When working on my MFA thesis, one of my advisors famously gave me the following advice: "Needs more gay sex.

 While I think writing what you want is the absolute truth...it's hard not to consider what Agents want because they are so dogmatic about it--or what they DON'T. One visit to #MSWL will do it.

a woodland creatures cake! CHOMP! You taste so good!

Writers treat agents like a cross between the stern headmaster and George Clooney. (Can I speak up? Will I get yelled at? Will he/she think I am stupid and cut off all communication?)

The author HIRES the agent in theory, but really the agent picks the author.

The agent is paid by the author and like all businesses, should seek to please the customer (I wonder if agents sit around thinking that a misplaced email will cause all communication to be shut off.)

When asked about my progress in finding representation, I tell people I am in the process of hiring an agent. NOT that I am wringing my hands, waiting to be picked last for dodge ball, wondering if I will ever find an agent so good they have the right to ignore me.

Janet, hope this doesn't sound like a slap to agents, since authors enable this as much as some agents allow it. I hope to someday hire an agent with whom I can have at least as respectful a relationship as I have with my plumber (a great guy whom I also hire to do work for me).

S.D.King-

I see what you're saying and I think there's some valid points in there... but I do think a differentiation needs to be made between the local plumber and the agent.

Although most of my knowledge of plumbing stems from Super Mario Brothers, I do know when I call my plumber, I have a list of 500 possible plumbers who would all be happy to take me on as a client as long as I pay them money. This is not the same for an agent. To ignore this fact is to not really take in the whole picture.

Yes, basic economics would deem that the agent is paid for the service they provide, but this is not a service that is open to the public (and for that matter, what an agent actually 'provides' is not an equal service among all agents. Some are better than others.). This is a service revolving around a partnership between two parties, a partnership predicated on a mutual interest where you are the product (and you're not the only product out there).

It's similar to a producer in a record studio. Sure, I'm the artist. I pay the producer and he adds his artistic touch to make my CD better... but if I fight him on every change, I'm going to end up with a garbage CD (assuming the producer is good) and I just paid a lot of money for a guy to hit the red record button.

It's an important distinction and it changes the relationship a lot. If my plumber only offered to service my toilet after I signed an agreement to only use him for his services, and via this contract I could also earn money for referring my wonderful plumber to other people, I'd certainly not view that relationship as simply as 'money in, money out'... especially if my referrals (books) were earning me a fair amount of cash.

Partnerships are not necessary for successful businesses, but they are also not viewed as customer and company.

Susan Bonifant has a good question:

Honestly, not only would it be humane to dash off a quick "I'm sorry (excuse here)" email, I can't think of a more understanding recipient than a writer who has been trying to deal with no response at all.

The problem is that once I send an email like that, the recipient replies, and will say something like "ok, when WILL it be done" and the answer is "hell if I know right now" and that's not really something you can say.  And the other horrible possibility is someone asks "well what the hell ARE you doing if you're not getting this done" and you can't say "well, you weren't important enough to be in the top three To Do things this week" even if it's true, especially if it's true. Yes, clients know they are not the one and only, but an agent does well to remember that no one likes to feel like they are the least important person on the roster. Ever.

I've been to PitchFest (and CraftFest) twice. I agree with bjmuntain that the experience is valuable in sharpening skills and I did get requests from agents - though I realized later that I needed to work on the manuscript more. So it could be helpful for.

But the most amazing thing I saw there was author Jon Land, who spent THREE HOURS of his time meeting with a long, long line of authors who wanted advice on how to pitch. He made the offer during CraftFest and promised to stay until everyone interested had a chance to run their pitch by him. And everyone did.

Not only is Jon a successful author with plenty of other things to do, but he was in the middle of negotiating a publishing contract and several times had to interrupt the session to take a call. Yet he still stayed until everyone had pitched.

Why do I share this? Because writers are a community and the most valuable reason to go to a conference is to be part of that community. The rest is nice, but that is pure gold.

That is also why I love this blog, because it's such a vibrant part of that community. Amanda, as you can see from these posts, everyone here is pulling for you and/or praying for you and that is what it's all about.

At Surrey, Diana (Gabaldon) saw me in the vendor's hall. I was talking to a mutual friend who had a table. She waved at me and came over to visit. We'd only been talking a few minutes, she was mostly asking about my youngest son Will who was in Iraq at the time.

I wasn't going to bother Diana, because I was sure she got hounded to death, but was happy she came over to visit. Then lo and behold someone came over and did his best, nonchalant pose author. "So tell me, Diana, what do you think of the current state of publishing?"

needed a break from editing so I'm watching Janet's favorite movie.
"You're gonna' need a bigger boat."
Love it.

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To celebrate the publication of Kari Lynn Dell's debut novel THE LONG RIDE HOME we are holding a writing contest!

I love this book with all my heart. And I've loved Kari's writing since I met her, way back in 2002 I think. Or maybe 2003. Anyway, forever ago in agent years!


Lucky winner (or winners!) will receive a copy of THE LONG RIDE HOME as a prize. I read this book in draft form some time back, and then the finished version just this week. I had to prop my eyes open with toothpicks the next morning because I could NOT put the book down and go to snoozerville at a proper hour.

The usual rules apply:

1. Write a story using 100 words or fewer.

2. Use these words in the story:


dell
horse
long
ride
home


3. You must use the whole word, but that whole word can be part of a larger word.
Long/longer is ok. Long/lounge is not.

4. Post the entry in the comment column of THIS blog post.

5. One entry per person. If you need a mulligan (a do-over) erase your entry and post again. It helps to work out your entry first and then post.

5. International entries are allowed, but prizes may vary for international addresses.

6. Titles count as part of the word count (you don't need a title)

7. Under no circumstances should you tweet anything about your particular entry to me. Example: "Hope you like my entry about Felix Buttonweezer!" This is grounds for disqualification.

Contest opens: Saturday 4/11/15 at 10am

Contest closes: Sunday 4/12/15 at 10am

Questions? Tweet to me @Janet_Reid



Ready? SET?

NOT YET! Comments will open when contest opens.

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I'll be at the Writers Digest in New York at the end of July and I'm going to the pitch slam. Can I just bring a query for you to look at, even though it's YA and not what you represent? I'd like to say hi and get something out of it. And I have to pretend I'm doing something bc I'm helping a friend of mine. (She told me bc I paid for it I'm participating.) I just want to be there for moral support.

If you can find me at the Pitch Slam you'll have traveled back in time about five years.  I'm doing a presentation at the Writers Digest conference here on 7/31/15, but I'm not taking pitches.  Remember, I'm not a fan of pitches at all.

However, to the larger question of asking an agent for help at a pitch session, go right ahead. You do want to be careful though about what you take to heart.  Advice from an agent who's not in the YA trenches on a daily basis can be questionable.

I'll never forget listening to a panel of YA tourists talk about the category in ways that were just plain wrong....and while they were authors, the lesson applies to agents as well.

I critique a lot of pitches for things I don't represent on QueryShark, but it's mostly about form and clarity, rather than "can I include dinosaurs in YA?"

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I've signed up for my first ThrillerFest and Thursday, July 9, 2015, is Pitchfest. I thought I'd get an early start on hyperventilating.

Mr.Shane Gericke, in his very helpful FAQ about Pitchfest, answers the following question;

Q. Last year, some authors brought one-page summaries of their books, which they could hand to the agents. Do you still recommend doing that?

A. It’s a good idea. My suggested template is at the bottom of this FAQ. It’s essentially a one-page form that lists your name, contact information, story synopsis, and author bio. Some agents want them, some don’t. I recommend you print up a dozen and bring them along, in case any of your agents want one.

*******
So, to get this absolutely straight, I should include a short story synopsis. Not a query, which is what I expect an agent would want, but a synopsis, which means I should include how my novel ends? (1) And what is a "full pitch package" when it's out, anyway?(2) I couldn't find this term anywhere in your archives.

The one page form Mr. Gericke shows as an example is very helpful, but the actual synopsis part is kind of vague. I've attached the example below, in case any of your subjects will also be attending Pitchfest. In fact, if anyone else is going I'd love to know.(3) I'm probably going on my own (what the hell would my husband do while I'm CraftFesting? He's up for it; he's a musician so he figures there must be some bars near the hotel with live music but then I'd worry about him getting blathered before the cocktail party even started), so I'm a tad concerned about, well, New York. Though I do hear the natives tolerate Canadians rather well.(4)

Anyway, right off topic, sorry, but I am going to ThrillerFest come hell or high water so any other tips besides Mr. Gericke's about what to include in this one-page summary would be most appreciated,

SINGLE-PAGE SUMMARY
This is my suggested template for the story summary you can hand the agents. Keep it to one page, maximum—this isn’t your full pitch package, it’s simply a reminder of who you are when they get back to the office. I used my own information to give you an idea of the length and tone for which you should strive, but feel free to write it any way you wish. If you include a photo of yourself—and you should, because it’s another way to tweak the agent’s memory —make sure it’s high-res, clear and crisp. A muddy, unfocused photo reflects badly on you.(5)

Enjoy:

Author: Shane Gericke
Book: Torn Apart

Synopsis: Tragedy strikes Emily Thompson, Martin Benedetti, Hercules Branch, Annie Bates and Ken Cross, the five Naperville, Illinois, police officers who’ve worked together since the beginning of Emily’s career . . . and one will die. A serial killer nicknamed “Hacksaw” sends Emily gift packages of human body parts while a dragnet tightens around drug traffickers, child kidnappers and spree killers in Illinois and Wisconsin. And whatever else you need to fill out your short, concise summary, which should only go a paragraph or two at the most, because, again, you’re writing this is a reminder-tweak to the agent, not as a full-blown pitch package. (6)

Bio: Shane Gericke has been held at knifepoint, hit by lightning, and shaken the cold sweaty hand of Liberace. He was born to write thriller novels! His latest is Torn Apart, a finalist for the Thriller Award for Best Novel, and a bestseller in print and Kindle. Before turning to fiction, he spent 25 years as a newspaper editor and reporter, most prominently at the Chicago Sun-Times. An original member of International Thriller Writers, he was chairman of the ThrillerFest literary festival in New York and founding director of its agent-author matching program, PitchFest.

Check him out at http://www.shanegericke.com, and on Facebook and Twitter.
Contact information:
E-mail:
Facebook:
Twitter:
Mailing address:
Home phone:
Cellphone:

This is what happens when people with good intentions but NO experience (I know Shane and like him; he's a terrific guy and his books scare the crepe outta me) tell you what agents want.



Let's look at the six biggest questions here:


(1)  So, to get this absolutely straight, I should include a short story synopsis. Not a query, which is what I expect an agent would want, but a synopsis, which means I should include how my novel ends?

No you should not. For starters, a synopsis of any utility is more than 250 words.  You're going to have space for far fewer words than that on a one-sheet.

If anything you'd include only the gist of your query: Character A faces a choice of Z or Q. If s/he chooses Z, this terrible thing will happen, but if s/he chooses Q, something else will happen that he doesn't much like either.  And just to keep it interesting, include what's at stake if s/he doesn't choose either Z or Q.

That's what I want to know if the VERY BRIEF TIME you have with an agent at a pitch session.  I think it's terrific if you have it written down. Saves you trying to memorize it.



(2) And what is a "full pitch package" when it's out, anyway?
I have NO idea. It sounds terrifying. EVERY SINGLE agent I know wants a query letter. And some pages. And maybe a synopsis. That's it.  I've never heard this called a "full pitch package" but maybe I'm just new here.

(3) in case any of your subjects will also be attending Pitchfest. In fact, if anyone else is going I'd love to know.
Well, I'm going to be there. Not taking pitches of course since I don't do that any more, but reading queries and offering advice on revising queries to make them more effective.  Details to come, but I'm really pleased that ThrillerFest and CraftFest are offering this to attendees this year.  I hope it will be a raging success.


(4) He figures there must be some bars near the hotel with live music but then I'd worry about him getting blathered before the cocktail party even started), so I'm a tad concerned about, well, New York. Though I do hear the natives tolerate Canadians rather well.
Bring him along. He can hang with us in the bar. We like Canadians a lot. They're not really foreigners more like bemused observers of American crazy. 

(5) If you include a photo of yourself—and you should, because it’s another way to tweak the agent’s memory make sure it’s high-res, clear and crisp. A muddy, unfocused photo reflects badly on you. 

DO NOT DO THIS. I don't even have photos of my clients in my office files let alone queriers (author photos are ALL electronic now). If you give me one of these, I will discard it.  Do not waste money doing this.  No one cares what you look like; I only care about what you write.  I will remember your plot and writing just fine.  PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS.   




(6) Synopsis: Tragedy strikes Emily Thompson, Martin Benedetti, Hercules Branch, Annie Bates and Ken Cross, the five Naperville, Illinois, police officers who’ve worked together since the beginning of Emily’s career . . . and one will die. A serial killer nicknamed “Hacksaw” sends Emily gift packages of human body parts while a dragnet tightens around drug traffickers, child kidnappers and spree killers in Illinois and Wisconsin. 

And whatever else you need to fill out your short, concise summary, which should only go a paragraph or two at the most, because, again, you’re writing this is a reminder-tweak to the agent, not as a full-blown pitch package. 

This isn't a synopsis. This isn't even a pitch. It might be flap copy, but it's not an effective query.  



To sum up: 

CraftFest schedules writers in five minute blocks of time.  There are a couple things I'd want to know if I were taking pitches:

1. A quick summary of how the story gets started: who is the main character, what choices does s/he face and what's at stake.  100 words.

2.  Whether the novel is finished.  I have zero interest in unfinished novels.  I've had writers ask me to just listen to a concept but that's almost entirely useless. Concepts don't make good books. Good stories make good books. In other words: THE WRITING.

3. The word count of the finished novel.


If you have those three things written on a piece of paper, along with your contact info, and a short bio, you're good.

Do NOT over think this.
Do NOT try to be clever.

Do NOT try to stand out from the crowd by doing something no one else is doing. All those people you see with cute and clever and innovative one sheets? NOT what I'm looking for. I'm looking for people who have figured out that simple is better than fancy; the information I ask for is not just mindless ramblings; and, the writing is what matters.


Generally I'm going to discard anything you give me. I don't keep paper files on prospective clients. EVERYTHING is electronic.  

You'll be just fine if you send me a query after T/fest that says "we met during CraftFest and you asked me to send a query."  I don't need to remember you specifically. I just need to see what you've written.  There's time enough to get to know each other in the bar, OR when we decide to talk about whether I'm the right agent for you.

Any questions?


 
 

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Recently, I've noticed quite a few writers talking about the long wait times they encounter with agents they've signed with. I am including myself in this bunch as I am with my second agent (the first one left the industry and we parted on very amicable terms). I like my current agent, but just like the first, she'd say something like, "I'll have notes on your latest MS by the end of the week!" and then a few more weeks will pass by before I actually see the notes. I see a lot of this being reported on AW and on other writing sites.

I get that agents are busy as hell. I myself have a really hectic job, but when we promise our clients a project by "the end of the week", we damn well better have it in the client's inbox by the end of the week, not the end of three weeks. And if we encounter an unforeseen delay, we send the client an e-mail with apologies and a heads-up to let them know we need a new deadline.

Is it ever acceptable to talk to your agent about it and be honest about how you feel with regards to their timing? Is there an okay way of saying, "You don't have to promise to get it to me within the week. You can take all the time you need, but please have it ready when you say it will be ready"? Or should I and my fellow writers just gnaw on our fingers in silence, wondering if this would actually be the week that we get our notes?

Yes, it's entirely acceptable to be straightforward with your agent about what working style suits you. You say it just like you said it to me: "It will help me tremendously if you only tell me something is coming when you know it is. I appreciate that priorities can shift in a day and a week, particularly with things that are important not urgent, but expecting something on Friday then not getting it, or an email saying it's delayed, is very difficult."




You and your agent are on the same team. One of the best ways to have effective communication is to tell the other person what works best for you.


I have had to learn this several times.  It's particularly useful for my minions to know how to act when I am in a towering rage.  Telling them what to do saves a LOT of misunderstanding.  Telling your agent what works for you will do that too.


I think one of the reasons that agents often say nothing rather than check in with "yea, I'm not getting this done" is first they feel guilty for NOT getting it done or they don't like to explain (baldly) that something was more important than your project (my skin crawls just writing that.)

One way you can help build trust is by never saying "well when WILL you get this done; I feel neglected." That can shut down communication really quickly.  I know it shouldn't but lets all realize how things actually work, not how you want them to work.

I know a lot about this problem because it afflicts me even as I write this.  I wish I had a better solution, but I don't...yet.

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What is your take on including sex scenes in non-Romance genres for adult category?

Most suggest: if it moves the story along and is inherent to the plot, include it.  Some say 50 Shades has opened the door to graphic sex in all genres. The genre I’m striving for is Suspense, not erotic Suspense.

In my current WIP, it is important that the two main characters are sexually involved but not being a Romance I’m not sure how to do this. Implied?  On the page? Half and half?

Writing sex scenes doesn’t bother me but reading them usually does, especially when graphic, I skip over. I find graphic sex boring. This woodland creature also fears a listing in the Bad Sex Scenes archives. Mine may be awful.  And I want to sell my m/s to the widest audience possible.

I’ve noticed agents are looking for steamy pages. What about in the Suspense genre? I’ve thought of writing two versions and querying different agents.

Is there a trend in the industry concerning sex on the page outside the Romance genre?

I'm with you. I skip over the graphic sex parts of novels. I'm not really interested in the five thousand ways one can describe Tab A into Slot B, repeat as needed.


And rather than worry about what agents think, this is the time when you MUST write to please yourself (harumph, get your mind out of the sheets there!)


If you don't want to read it, don't write it.

I'm absolutely not aware of the general taste in the reading public shifting to more steamy. Yes, 50 Shades of Grey did very well, but it doesn't mean there's going to be an outcry for  Jack Reacher going graphic when he next arrives in Portland to have lunch with Samantha Kincaid.


And more generally, don't pay any attention to "what's hot" (so to speak.)  Write the novel you want to write. If everyone is telling you dinosaur porn  is the next big thing, don't just leap to make all your werewolves over into dinosaurs.

Write YOUR novel.  That's hard enough without trying to factor in what someone else is sure is the Next Big Thing. 

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While I am off praying for world peace, and awaiting the Resurrection, I hope all my very treasured blog readers will use these few days to post a link to their blog or website so you can all get to know each other.

The links are in the comments section of Thursday's blog post here.


Have a very happy start to April, and the new spring season!

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While I am off praying for world peace, and awaiting the Resurrection, I hope all my very treasured blog readers will use these few days to post a link to their blog or website so you can all get to know each other.

The links are in the comments section of Thursday's blog post here.


Have a very happy start to April, and the new spring season!

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While I am off praying for world peace, and awaiting the Resurrection, I hope all my very treasured blog readers will use these few days to post a link to their blog or website so you can all get to know each other.

The links are in the comments section of Thursday's blog post here.


Have a very happy start to April, and the new spring season!

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While I am off praying for world peace, and awaiting the Resurrection, I hope all my very treasured blog readers will use these few days to post a link to their blog or website so you can all get to know each other.

Post the link in the comments section of THIS blog post.  Comments too, if you like. 


Have a very happy start to April, and the new spring season!

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Thank your for posting about auctions and pre-empts on your blog  - it seems to be a less-often talked about issue (as far as I can tell when I researched all that stuff in the past). It brought to mind a post that Kristin Nelson had a week or so ago about how some agents exaggerate their reporting in the Publisher's Marketplace venue. 

 It also reminded me of seeing a post by another agency that said they don't post in PM because it feels like bragging. (This one made me both laugh and also think, "hmm" about their success rate, neither of which I believe they were going for as they are a Christian-based agency.) They then asked about how much querying writers rely on PM.

For my part, I liked PM to help me with kinds of sales and frequency (and not necessarily about the $ end of it, which is where I feel like the agency worrying about bragging is actually considering). I know not all agents or editors report sales, but it gave me an extra piece of information to work with. I also just enjoy seeing what's coming down the pike in various genres. 

My question (finally): If a querying writer is to spend the money on PM, do you believe that is a valuable asset for him/her? How reliable is the information?

 

I think it's an amazing trove of information, but mostly about what's NOT there.  If you are considering an agent who has ZERO sales posted at Publishers Marketplace, you'll want to ask some pretty precise questions:

1. What have you sold this year?
2. What books are being published this year that you sold?
3. How do you handle foreign rights?
4. How do you handle film rights?


The answers you're looking for here are:

1. List of books with author names and publishing houses.  Preferably houses you've heard of. If you haven't heard of the publisher, fire up the google machine.

2. List of titles that you can look up on Amazon, or B&N.

3. A specific answer. It's perfectly fine if an agency lets the publisher retain translation rights. If the agency tries to retain those rights, who handles foreign rights at the agency? What kind of track record do they have. (See #1 and #2 above)

4. Just make sure they don't leave your film and performance rights with the publisher.



If you find an agent with just a few deals posted, ASK why that is.  I'm woefully behind on posting deals on a bunch of books for a lot of reasons that I won't go in to in public, but will mention to a prospective client [under the cone of silence of course.]


If you find an agent with a lot of deals, I think you're able to trust the reporting. Sure a few agents bump up their sale to the next category, but really who cares.

The purpose of making a book sound enticing on PubMkt is to attract foreign, audio, and film deals. It's not to hoodwink authors.

If a book sells in a "pre-empt" an agent thinks it's more likely to get noticed. I don't particularly care if an agent is  fast and loose with terms in order to attract attention for his/her clients. 

I will say that I insist on accurate reporting here at The Reef.  It's always easier to report correctly, so you don't have to remember what you said.



You should be MUCH more interested in the agents who have clients on the lists of books that sell well. That's where you see the folks who know how to sell books to the right editor at the right publisher and get sales and marketing excited.

 



 

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A recent email exchange with one of my authors:

> ...I got far too many letters from
> prisoners, so a post office box was a necessity.

I get those too!
I always reply personally to those poor guys. Their handwritten hopes for publication just kinda break my heart. A LOT of Sci-Fi writers are in prison.

If we'd been in actual conversation, that third sentence might very possibly have passed unremarked because we both knew what I meant: the majority of query letters coming from a prison address are for SFF books.

But written on the page, it stops the eye (and rightfully so!)

If you'd sent a query letter that said most of your audience was in prison, we'd have a problem. Of course, what you'd meant to say was "lots of prisoners have ordered my book."

When you write, you know what you mean. Your task is to make sure I do too.  Whether your reader does  is YOUR responsibility. If I don't understand your sentences, that's YOUR problem (generally) not mine.

How to make sure you avoid this problem: other readers. No matter how you get them, it's really important to have a second set of eyes on your manuscript that will catch things like this. Someone who is thin lipped, evil-eyed, and sucks lemons for a living. If you can pay them in lemonade and sauerkraut, so much the better.

Here's the kind of thing Miss Persnikity will catch:

should of

lie/lay/lay

There/they're

Bale/bail (misuse of found just tonight in a published book!)

How many SFF writers are in prison (or exiled in Carkoon)




I read your manuscript with Miss Persnikity looking over my shoulder. Too many tsks tsks from her and I know you're more careless than the kind of writer I want to work with regularly.

It's not a problem to write this stuff. The problem is when you fail to revise it away.

(and how many revisions are enough? This blog post had seven in three days)

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My memoir was published in 2012, both as an ebook and in print (POD), by a small independent publisher. It's done quite well on Amazon, and also through my independent sales (via book signings, speaking appearances, etc.) I have many reviews on Amazon, most at 4-5 stars, in addition to very favorable editorial reviews.

Most of my readers have come from a niche market, which I have worked hard to cultivate and have a sizable following, but I believe that there are more readers in the general public who would appreciate and learn from my memoir. I've been unable to break into major bookstores because the book is POD.

My publisher is leaving the business and I retain all rights. Do you think it would make sense to pitch it to agents or larger publishers? As a second edition, for foreign, audio book or even movie rights? And how should I present it?

I think it makes a lot of sense to pitch it to agents or a larger press.


What they'll  want to know is who you have NOT been able to reach. The first thing you can mention is the library market. You've also missed most bookstores that won't order books on a one at a time basis from small presses.  

Bookstores like to order their inventory from reliable suppliers and a small press they've never heard of us doesn't really qualify as that.  I don't know what sales terms your old publisher offered but just the fact bookstores could only order that one book from them made it a less desirable item to stock.



When you query, you need to give your sales stats, and talk about the target audience you haven't reached. (I did a previous blog post on that topic)  Your Amazon reviews aren't going to be as helpful here as you think. Sales numbers are what will get you in the door. (That's the subject of a previous blog post)


It's also not going to be helpful to say "my book was POD" because print on demand is a technology not a method of sale.  The information that the editor/agent will need is whether the publisher sold on a returns allowed basis; what the discount was; what the catalog or retail price was; whether there was distribution of any kind. You may not know this information. If you can, find out. The bookstores where you sold books will know if you can't get the information from your publisher.

Lots of large publishers use print on demand technology to fulfill small orders so they don't have to carry inventory.  You'd never know it from just buying the book.

Don't mention foreign rights, audio or film rights in the query. You need a book deal before you get subsidiary rights (and for all you clever exceptionistas out there, yes there are exceptions to this, but you don't plan to be the exception in your query letter, now do you?)

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Did you repaint the office? Did I miss what colors you'd selected? We've got paint chips up in the circulation room of the library, but no consensus yet. One of the orange-y colors was called "Pompeii Clay", which I thought perhaps not in good taste, but I found a nice gray to pair with it (they did not call it "Vesuvius Ashfall"). My coworkers do not agree

The very first thing I wrote in it was a line I heard today while watching the "Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" - (to paraphrase): "Everything is going to work out alright in the end. If it is not alright, then it is not the end yet."

"...but of course, the EFI report was bogged down with the AWT--"
"What does EFI mean?" I asked. I already knew the answer to this question.
"Extremely Frigging Important. Then Charlie--"
"And AWT?"
"Awesome Wonder Team."
"Right. Carry on."

I've just started a new job, and after 23 years at the finished end of the film production chain, going back to the beginning of it has been like learning a new language.

My question for QOTKU, therefore, is: How does blurbing work? How do publishers know they're going to get good reviews from the people they ask to blurb? Do they ever get blurbers write back saying "Sorry, I hated this book. I can't give you a positive blurb." I would like to think so."

I do recall, however, middle-school-me almost refusing to read The Hunger Games when I borrowed it because Stephenie Meyer had blurbed it and I was in a huge anti-Twilight phase.

Is it the job of the publisher or the author to ask for blurbs? Are authors required to pursue them, or are they only asked to do this if they happen to have contact with HPNYTBSAs?

My question is do publishers pay for blurbs? Especially HPNYTBSA?

I've been thinking about something for a while. Many times we woodland creatures worry about nitpicky things like someone stealing our stupendous writing idea if we shared too much of it.

This contest actually proves what we've been told many times in the writing community; "Only you can write your story."

Think about it. We're given five words, and not one of us ever comes close to having a similar story. We might re-use a word or two in the same way (wordsmith, for example) but beyond that, our stories are as diverse as our fingerprints and voices.

.." I've often wondered,(one or two of mine have landed here I think)what it is that makes them not a story for you? I've come to the conclusion it's because in some way, the writer hasn't resolved the MC's situation. I.e. it's left hanging in some way. Am I close?

"There are a lot of places now to publish articles that don't require querying first at all. The danger there is if your writing isn't up to par, you can damage your career pretty easily."

I'm not quite sure what this means. ie: the publication will remember your first sub-par submission and it will prejudice them for future attempts? Or that they might actually publish it and others will see this sub-par quality and make judgments from there? Or...?

How is it different with a short story submission to a mag?

One thing to take away from querying non-fiction magazines: Don't wait until you've finished writing the article to query, unless you want to prove to yourself you can write that article. Non-fiction magazines buy ideas - very unlike fiction magazines - and they'll reject the idea, too. They don't want to see a full article until they commission it, based on your idea. Since you wouldn't sell the same article to two magazines (even similar magazines have different focuses and styles), you'll just be rewriting the article again.

Basically, the difference between fiction and non-fiction magazines is: Fiction magazines buy writing. Non-fiction magazines buy ideas, and they assume you can write the idea. This latter is why it's good to have 'clippings' - articles or other writing you can point to, to tell the magazine 'See? I can write goooood.' Of course, that's where the catch 22 comes in: magazines want you to have previous published pieces, but you can't get those unless a magazine will publish them.

If you feel your non-fiction writing on your chosen topic is professional enough, you could start a blog about it, to get pub credit and followers. I believe it's not difficult to get a blog on io9, and it may attract more readers. Or, if you're able to market your blog, you can do that, too.

a woman who was clearly the sole influence in Eve's decision to eat the apple in the garden of Eden in the first place...

Am I wrong to think "this is the day and age of forever" only applies to free blogs?

Once you put something out on the internet - no matter where - you no longer have control over it. Despite security precautions and content protection, it's out of your hands. (You still have copyright, but you don't have control. Neither does the website it was posted on.)

I heard a Pulitzer-prize winning author speak at a class and tell the story of some good advice she once gave. An editor friend asked her thoughts about a horse book that was going up for auction. This author had a love of horses and dabbled with a few books in the genre.

"Do you think I should bid on it?" the editor asked.

"No, horse books never sell," the author advised.

With this great tip, the editor passed on the chance to bid for Seabiscuit. Amazingly, they're still friends.

How much extra work are books/authors like that? Previously you mentioned/joked that Little, Brown had an entire branch office dedicated to James Patterson. I'm sure an agent can max out on the number of clients she represents. So if, for example, you represented five Lee Child's, or apparently just one James Patterson, would that be all you could handle? Their royalty statements are probably longer, and I imagine you have to field more calls regarding sales of rights [a nice bit of extra work, I'm sure]. But is a mega-selling book/author 10% more work than your “normal” clients, or 25%, or 100%? Inquiring minds [okay, maybe just mine] want to know.

Nothing you have turned down has gone on to big things. I guess that I'm going to have to prove you wrong. I'm sorry, I still love you and have all of the respect in the world for you but that is just how it has to be.

With over 100 queries every week, do you even remember the ones you turn down. I imagine you might remember manuscripts, especially if you read to the end. But do you remember rejected queries?

Last night, I must've had you on my mind too, because - after running across something about "body horror" when researching agents, I ended up having a dream about having scary cysts removed from my body that turned out to be lima beans.

I honestly didn't realize just how much a part of my mental landscape this community is ...

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 This question is a little different, but I'm curious. Have you ever rejected a query, proposal, or manuscript, but much later down the line saw the book on the shelves, selling like mad, and thought, "Damn."

Oddly, no.
I've certainly seen projects I've not taken on go on to be repped and sold, but I don't think I've passed on anything like 50 Shades of Gray, or Harry Potter, or even Lee Child.

On the other hand, I'm probably not the right person to answer this question because I don't really keep track of things I've passed on. It's entirely possible I have passed on things that went on to do well, and I'm just unaware of them.

I do know that editors are a bit more keenly aware of what they were offered [and not.] I've sold a couple books on very exclusive submission, only to have other editors call to ask if someone else at the publisher had seen the book and passed.

It's easy to have a million regrets in this business, but it's critical for morale to keep them at bay. My focus is on what's coming up that will knock your sox off, not what I missed two years ago. 

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 I'm getting ready to send out query letters and I want to be as transparent as possible with potential agents. When I was 17 I wrote a ridiculous teen fiction book, and e-published it on Amazon for my friends. Only 15 people in total bought it, and then I took it off of Amazon. My current manuscript is not related at all to my past manuscript, they're not even in the same genre, but I'm worried about being technically previously published.

Does my silly teenage fanfiction mean I'm previously published, and do I have to mention that in my query letters? I feel like this is probably a stupid question, but I want to make sure I'm not doing something inadvertently wrong. Thanks for your help!

Yes.
No.
It's not.
You're welcome.


Now, let's elaborate.

First, yes, you've been published. Putting something on Amazon, and letting friends buy it is indeed "published."  

However.

You really don't need to mention that youthful peccadillo at this stage.  When you are published, and your novel is being considered for awards however, you are going to have to come clean.  That's when you mention to your AGENT (and no one else) that you had this teen novel, and together you can decide what to do from there.

This is NOT a silly or stupid question. This is a question that gets asked a lot these days cause all those folks at Amazon want your money and don't think they need to advise you of any pitfalls.

And sadly, this is the day and age of forever.  Back in my youth (when The Divine Comedy was taught as Contemporary Literature) a wordslinger could move to the next city-state, change her nom de plume and have no one the wiser. Now, not so much.

This won't kill you. It probably won't hurt you.  Just don't do it again if you get frustrated with querying and figure "oh hell, I'll just self-publish and see what happens."

 

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We celebrated Colin Smith's birthday on Tuesday with a writing contest.  Here are the results.

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Dear Million-Toothed Goddess of the Sea,

I am currently reading "You Are A Writer (so start ACTING like one)" by Jeff Goins. and in Chapter 10 he said something that made me feel compelled to seek your advice. In this chapter, he focuses on building writing experience by submitting writing pieces for publication in magazines.

He said, "Try pitching to several publications or publishers at once, following the appropriate guidelines for each...Now, this doesn't mean to just blast the same idea to every publication. Most publications consider simultaneous submissions to be unethical. But you can create several different articles from a single idea."

That threw me for a loop. First he said submit to multiple publishers at once (following guidelines). Then he said to don't blast the same idea, but to create several different articles from a single idea or else it'll likely be unethical. Let it be known that I have zero experience with magazines. From the book industry, we submit to multiple agents at a time for the same piece.

Obviously, Jeff's experience is more broad, but he's said some more things about magazine publishing that just aren't done in the traditional book publishing process, which equates me to the usefulness of a potato. Can you clarify the basic magazine submission process? I really don't even see magazines calling for submissions anymore [those were the days, eh Stephen King?]. Thank you, because I hate being a potato. Unless there's bacon. Always say yes to bacon!

Querying for articles in a magazine is very different from querying for books. For starters, you're going to be querying NON-FICTION articles almost exclusively.  If you're submitting short stories, you follow the submission guidelines and often they DO take simultaneous subs.

For non-fiction articles the idea is to have some sort of topic that you know a lot about and come up with different stories for it.

For example, I know a lot about query letters. I might pitch The SharkBait Writer's Guide to commission an article on "Effective Queries for Fish." I'll use the same knowledge base to query the Carkoon Prison Times for an article on "How To Query From Prison." I can pitch those outlets at the same time.

Two separate story ideas, but essentially the same topic.

What I can NOT do is pitch "How To Query The Big Fish Agents" to two or more different magazines at the same time UNLESS their submission guidelines say it's ok.

See the difference?



There are a lot of places now to publish articles that don't require querying first at all. The danger there is if your writing isn't up to par, you can damage your career pretty easily.

 

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It's blog reader Colin Smith's birthday today.

I thought about calling him up and warbling Happy Birthday, but he did mention he was sleeping in till 10am today.

Thus we have a great chance to surprise the stuffing out of him with this contest.

Contest opens NOW (3/24/15) and runs through tomorrow (3/25/15) at 7am.




The usual rules apply:

1. Write a story using 100 words or fewer.

2. Use these words in the story:

smith
exile
link
seven
music


3. You must use the whole word, but that whole word can be part of a larger word.
thus: music/musician is ok, but not exile/exfiltrate

4. Post the entry in the comment column of THIS blog post.

5. One entry per person. If you need a mulligan (a do-over) erase your entry and post again) It helps to work out your entry first and then post.

5. International entries are allowed, but prizes may vary for international addresses.

6. Titles count as part of the word count (you don't need a title)

7. Under no circumstances should you tweet anything about your particular entry to me. Example: "Hope you like my entry about Felix Buttonweezer!" This is grounds for disqualification.

Contest opens: NOW 3/24/15 7am

Contest closes: 3/25/15 7am

Questions? Tweet to me @Janet_Reid
Ready? SET?

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A high profile NYT best selling author has offered a commitment to blurb the future galleys of the ms I'm currently shopping... (and there WILL be galleys, dammit!). Good or bad idea to include this info/author's name in the housekeeping section of a query?

It won't hurt you, so why not. If you were sending that information to me, I'd want to know why HPNYTBSA has read your manuscript. Thus you may want to include that information as well.

You would say "HPNYTBSA Felix Buttonweezer has offered to blurb my novel. He read it while incarcerated at Carkoon and it soon became his favorite escapist pleasure."

The reason I'm not jumping up and down and screaming YahooooKalamazoooo about this blurb offer is that sometimes the audience for one author does not translate to the audience of another.  My fins would falter if Lee Child offered to blurb a novel by Tawna Fenske for example.  Tawna Fenske is a terrific writer, and I love her books but they are quite unlike the Reacher novels. You haven't mentioned if you think your audience will be the same as HPNYTBSA's.

At this stage though, there's no harm in including the information.

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On Monday, the blog topic was pre-empts and auctions, which is one of my favorite topics.

Craig asked

"Is it something that writers should aspire to? Or is it something that should cause an emotional Lesley Gore moment? Do these kinds of things happen to normal people or is it reserved for things like the Patterson Franchise?"

Editor Penguin requests ms. QOTKU submits.
Editor SohoCrime requests ms. QOTKU submits (and indicates another publisher is looking at it?).
Editor Minotaur requests ms. QOTKU submits (and indicates other publishers are looking at it?).
All want the ms., so QOTKU sets up an auction wherein each editor vies for ms. The one with the best deal (according to the Agent and Author) wins out.

To clarify, does an agent chat up an editor about a ms to assess their interest, or, do they just investigate editors for suitable interests (much like authors search for the correct agent to read their work) and then simply send the submission package to them?

"When I was querying The Five Stages of Andrew Brawley, one agent suggested I add some paranormal elements to the story. I didn't think that advice worked with what I was doing, so I ignored it. However, nearly every single agent in my first round of querying told me I'd botched the ending, so I listened to their advice and completely rewrote the ending."

I’m a third party witness to something like this. Except it was a written message not a phone call. An editor included a long critique with her rejection. I read my friend’s manuscript making comments along the way. I read the editor’s critique again after I read the manuscript. The editor was right on target (for the most part). The interesting thing is I can see what the editor meant but my friend currently cannot. She’s moved on to a promising new story (from historical romance to technopunk). I’ll encourage her keep the editor’s critique and return to the historical romance novel when she’s ready.

Does no one else go on dating sites to massage ugly people? Nope? Just me?

"RUBBING TINDER, an erotic thriller about a man who stalks online-dating service users, only to rub them the wrong way on purpose, in a totally tubular deal, for publication in 2016, by Janet Reid on behalf of Fuzzy Print Literary Services."

 "I've never rewritten a book I loved. If I couldn't see the flaws, there was no point trying to fix them."

What is an example of a good query letter FROM an agent (or however you get books before publishers? Let's say you have opted to represent Felix Buttonweezer's breakout novel Deep Greens about a CIA operative posing as a world renowned kale chef and you think this baby needs to hit the presses NOW. How would you pitch it?

For 17 years I worked as a bookseller. I ordered backlist (i.e. reordered books that sold) for the store and handled special orders. In my opinion, the best way to see of a small/Indie press is legitimate is to check out their distribution to bookstores. If their website says something like "Distributed to the trade by Macmillan" then they are legit. "Books available from Ingram and other wholesalers" also means bookstores can easily get their books and you should be fine. Make sure one of your first questions to whatever Indie press contacts you is about distribution.

Elissa and Amy, I went to school with a Honey Potts and a Sundae Monday. What's funny is that Honey complained because they always spelled Potts with one T and Sundae hated that people always spelled her name like the day...hello...what do you think your parents were thinking of.

Why do parents make up such funny names?

My brother-in-law the teacher, had a kid in his class, (the name was pronounced as Sha-theed), spelled Shithead

Karen Diamond, an amazing young woman and a beyond-talented writer, shared two quotes with her blog readers when she knew her battle to survive was near over. In my writer's notebook and on my desk, I have tattooed those quotes to my soul in the hope that I may assign their sentiments to my own life. I try, I really do, but sometimes I fail because wanting more, often stands taller than the mountain of what I already have.
The quotes, the first by Joseph Campbell and the second, an edited form, ascribed to Buddha.

“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned so as to live the life that is waiting for us.”
“In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.”

Karen, my son-in-law’s sister, was 27 and very wise to share with all of us these answers to human existence. I am privileged to have known her.

What that horse trader JetReid doesn't want you to know is, she once bought two sheep. Yes, she did. Hee hee hee

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Reading the submission guidelines of numerous agents, many ask that a query "tell us the entire story--from beginning to end. We want (need) to know what happens." They specifically say they don't want anything akin to jacket copy or two intriguing paragraphs. Obviously, were one going to query these agents, one would follow their guidelines.

I've poured over helpful websites including Writer's Digest and, of course, Query Shark. I've deduced that you prefer the jacket copy/two intriguing paragraphs type of query.

If, however, a particular agent's submission guidelines simply say, "Send your query to such and such email and include the first 5 pages..." without expressing a preference, which is the appropriate way to go? Two intriguing paragraphs? Or a full on synopsis? 

I'm astonished to learn that someone wants a full on plot synopsis in a query. I've never heard of such a thing! However, if that's what the guidelines say, follow them.

Absent instructions to the contrary, send only the enticing two paragraphs that introduce the main character and the plot. Entice the reader to want more.  The reason that QueryShark asks for that is because that's what most agents want.

I'm interested to see who these "many" are that ask for the entire story.  Send me the links to the sites if you can dig them up without spending too much time on it.

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Do you keep a writer's notebook?

A notebook is an essential tool for remembering great phrases and paragraphs you read. I've kept one for years and thumbing through it reminds me of the books I've read and loved. Actually writing things down by hand helps it stick in your brain too.

[It was when I found myself writing things from TRICKSTER in my notebook that I first fully realized what an extrordinary writer Jeff Somers is.  Don't ever tell him of course. We like to torture him with wry observations about his character and cats, not confuse him with compliments.]


Two things I added to my notebook yesterday came from Evan Lewis's new story in the upcoming May 2015 issue of Alfred Hitchcock Mystery Magazine.

 
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Judging by the old man's hands, I'd have tagged him at sixty. The confidence and economy of his movements might shave ten years from that, but the truth was in his eyes.  Those eyes had seen Lincoln shot and Caesar stabbed, and were probably watching when Cain killed Able.  Now they were watching me.

I fished for a way to begin. "How well do you know Portland?"

The Old Man's shoulders rolled in a noncommittal way. "We've cuddled," he said, "but never kissed."

What's the most recent thing you've written in your writer's notebook, or jotted down to remember as great writing?

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