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Viewing: Blog Posts Tagged with: restaurant, Most Recent at Top [Help]
Results 1 - 10 of 10
1. Comic: Picture Book Restaurant

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2. Comic: Fortune Cookie Query

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3. Elvis - the Real Story...maybe

A year-long celebration to commemorate Elvis Presley's first professional recording on July 5, 1954, is set to take place on Independence Day weekend in Memphis and Graceland. There are people who believe that "the King" is still alive and that he planned his disappearance. So let's say that this was the case and that a very old Elvis is living in anonymity, somewhere, but makes rare appearances at nondescript venues like gas station diners to relive the good, old days.


Elvis – The Real Story
                                                      By Eleanor Tylbor
 
 CAST OF CHARACTERS

 
TAMMY        40-something avid Elvis fan and wife of Len
LEN                40-something husband of Tammy
"THE" ELVIS, former big star/singer/performer

 
THE TIME
The present

 THE PLACE
Jackson’s 7-11 GAS BAR AND DINER

 
Photos of Elvis cover a large portion of one wall; Elvis songs play none-stop. There are a few tables with chairs on one side of the room, while the other side of the room has the usual gas station products and displays of motor oil, etc.

 AT RISE:

 TAMMY and LEN, two customers, are seated at a table looking around the room
LEN
(Scrutinizing the surroundings)
Um…who recommended this place?
 
 TAMMY
(reading book)
The restaurant guide write-up says it’s fine dining with a difference
 
LEN
Fine dining if you’re a rat! Did you happen to notice that a cockroach just crawled out of our bread basket? Must be one that escaped the Chef’s special catch-of-the-day
 
TAMMY
Stop being so negative and take in the atmosphere
 
LEN
You mean the aromatic scent of “eau du trash” coming from the back? Phee-ew!
 
TAMMY
You’re so…so…provincial in your thinking, sweetheart. It's about this authentic ‘60’s décor that gives the place its special caché!
 
LEN
More like early condemned. Every square inch of wall space is covered with faded Elvis photos and the man’s been dead for how many years?
 
TAMMY
That's the beauty of this place! It’s like a shrine devoted to “The King.” It's all too…wonderful
 
LEN
Are you saying that this…this gas station and three table diner was the King of Rock and Roll’s eatery of choice? Not!
 
TAMMY
For your information they say he used to eat fried chicken here and sometimes he even entertained diners
 
LEN
If I had known we were coming here to eat, I’d have checked to make sure my insurance policy was paid up
 
TAMMY
You know how long I hadda wait to get reservations for this restaurant…
 
LEN
…obviously not long enough…
 
 
TAMMY
…seven months! If you think I’m going to give up the chance to dine here…
 
LEN
…and a fine dining establishment it is – if you’re into salmonella poisoning
 
TAMMY
Get a grip! The waiter is coming so try to act normal, if that’s possible
               the waiter dressed in an Elvis jumpsuit struts over, swinging his hips in a
              typical Elvis-like walk. He smoothes the sides of his hair with his hands,
             frequently
 
WAITER
(swinging his hips between every word)
Evening folks’. Need a menu? Uh-huh – oh yeah…
 
LEN
No. We prefer to use ESP to order. Of course we need a menu!
 
TAMMY
Don’t mind my husband – I don’t. Leave the menu here and we’ll choose
 
LEN
So tacky. All the dishes are Elvis songs. 'Be-bop-a-lu-la' chicken wings…' The 'Love Me Tender' t-bone looks questionable and it comes with fries that are probably a couple months old and a 'I Did It My Way' salad. Look at this: says here on the menu that all their steaks are aged to perfection. Yesterday's road-kill most likely
 
TAMMY
Have you considered that your cranial spark plugs have stopped kicking in? I can’t make up my mind – so many choices…
 
               the waiter comes over to take the order
 
LEN
Are all those dishes served a la carte?
 
WAITER
(swinging hips)
No – on a plate. Uh-huh…
 
TAMMY
Just choose something already
 
WAITER
Want me to come back, folks? Uh-huh…
 
                                                                                                            LIGHTS DIM
 
TAMMY
Ssshhh! Quiet! The shows is gonna begin
 
                                                                                            SOUND: GUITAR TWANG
 
LEN
I don’t see why we hav’ta be quiet. Cheez – I can hear the sound of someone pumping gas outside, not to mention the smell. Mind you, it's hard to tell the difference between the food and the gas
 
              (The song from “2001: A Space Odyssey” is heard and the waiter now dressed
              in a mechanic’s uniform on the other side of the room walks in front of the
             counter holding a hand mic.)
 
VOICE OVER
“For your entertainment and pllllea-sure, the King has entered the building!”
 A very over-weight man dressed in a white jump suit enters, stopping to pose while leaning on a cane. A wide belt hangs well below a sagging stomach; black aviator glasses cover his eyes and a badly-fitting black wig sits lob-sided towards the front of his head
(VOICE-OVER)
“Direct from his engagement at the luxurious Pink Flamingo Laundromat and Bank Drive Thru in Tijuana, Mex-i-co, the management of Jackson’s 7/11 and Diner is proud to present, “the” King of Rock’n’Roll himself, the one – the only – El-vis!”
 
A bent over Elvis slowly makes his way to the other side of the room. He stoops  over to kiss Len, who pushes him way
 
ELVIS
“Whoops – sorry. Gotta get my eyes checked
 
he whips out a dirty handkerchief, spits on it and cleans his eyes and replaces it in a back pocket
 
ELVIS
(in weak squeaky voice)
Thank y’all very much! It’s the first time I been back this way goin’ on twenty years…or maybe it’s thirty…could be forty… Anyway… Good t'see y’all ain’t fergetten the King
              whips out his handkerchief again and blows his nose
 
ELVIS
Guess I ain’t the same Elvis you remember a ways back, huh? But then who is?
 
              starts coughing and choking. Scantily dresses nurses rush over to pat him on
             the back
 
ELVIS
See? I still got it but now I don’t know what to do with it! Thank y’all very much… Listen ladies – go see if you can find my extra set of dentures that I left in a steak yesterday.
 
              starts to choke again and a well-endowed female doctor wearing tight fitting
             clothing enters, with a stethoscope draped around her neck
 
DOCTOR
Now Mr. Elvis – honey – you know y'all gotta take it easy. Your ticker ain’t what it used to be
 
 
ELVIS
(laughing and staring at her breasts)
Yeah but ask me if I care. Thank you all very much. And now I’m gonna sing you a personal favourite of mine…at least I think it's a favorite...what's the name of the song now...nobody help me - it'll come back ...
 
              Elvis sings the first few lines of “My Way” completely off-key
 
LEN
(starting to get up)
Oh fer… We’re not gonna stay and listen to this…
 
              Sound of tires squeaking to a stop and the slam of car doors
 
ELVIS
Uh-oh…they’re coming back…I knew they’d find me… Damn aliens!
 
              Two males wearing white outfits move on either side of Elvis and take
              his arms
 
                                                                                                
MALE 1
C’mon pops. You got another gig at the Sunnyvale Nursing Home
 
ELVIS
But…but…I ain’t finished my set, yet!
 
MALE 1
(shaking his head and winking at Len and Tammy)
You don’t wanna be late for your big entrance.
 
ELVIS
Where’s my peanut butter and banana sandwich. I caint sing without it!
 
MALE 1
Here you are…
 
               the two men start to lead Elvis off the stage but Elvis stops and addresses the
              couple
ELVIS
Thank you all very much!
 
Elvis walks over, signs a piece of paper and hands it to Len and then exits with the men
 
LEN
(addressing waiter)
That was not “the” Elvis Presley now, was it? You got us here under false pretences. And that’s against the law, y’know!
 
WAITER
The guy is over 80 years old. Whad’ya expect? He’s got two hip replacements, a bad knee and now all that shaking he does is the real thing, poor guy. By the way, know that piece of paper he handed you?
 
LEN
I really couldn’t care less about the man’s autograph… In fact this is what I think of you AND your Elvis
               LEN rips up the piece of paper into small pieces
 
WAITER
You shouldn’t have done that. Uh-uh…
 
LEN
Elvis my a-s-s!
 
WAITER
That piece of paper would’a given you a free tank of gas with your meal. Oh well…uh-huh…
 
Len throws himself down on the floor picking up the pieces of paper trying to put them together
 
LEN
A tank of gas is a tank of gas is…
 
VOICE OVER
“The King has left the building”
 
LEN
(on his knees scooping up pieces of paper frantically)
Hang on a minute. I can stick these pieces together… Help me Tammy – at the price of gas these days…
 
 ©Eleanor Tylbor, 2009

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4. Comic: The Font Restaurant

 

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5. Comic: The Edible Library Restaurant

I'm posting some of my older comics here as I catalog and tag them in prep for a print book compilation. You can find my comics for writers on Inkygirl (http://inkygirl.com), Tumblr (http://inkygirl.tumblr.com) and Pinterest (http://pinterest.com/inkyelbows/comics-for-writers-inkygirl-com)

OHI0116 LiteraryRestaurant 500w

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6. Newfoundland, Day 2: St. John’s Down Town 1

My in-laws had an event to attend in down town St. John’s in the evening, so I went in with them and then walked the streets of St. John’s alone, with the intentions of finding some place to eat dinner, sketch, and check out the George Street Festival. No time to sketch the meal, but I [...]

5 Comments on Newfoundland, Day 2: St. John’s Down Town 1, last added: 8/21/2009
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7.

In God We Trust. How do you spell that?
by Eleanor Tylbor


Perhaps he means well but somehow changing one's name to "In God We Trust" is bound to have interesting or at least humorous results. If the court allows him to do this.

Steve Kreuscher wants a judge to allow him to legally change his name. He wants to be known as "In God We Trust."

Kreuscher says the new name would symbolize the help God gave him through tough times. The 57-year-old man also says he's worried that atheists may succeed in removing the phrase "In God We Trust" from U.S. currency. He recalls that the phrase "God Reigns" was removed from the Zion city seal in 1992 after Illinois courts deemed it unconstitutional. Zion was founded as a theocracy - by a sect that believed the Earth was flat. The school bus driver and amateur artist in the northern Chicago suburb says he has filed a petition to change his name in Lake County Circuit Court.

************************************************************************************

So let's say he is allowed to change his name to In God We Trust.

Let's say it's time for him to sign his signature.


IN GOD WE TRUST
(paying for food at restaurant)
Do you take major credit cards?

WAITER
Of course, sir

IGWT
Okay...here. Take this one

(waiter walks away examining credit card. Returns a few minutes later)

WAITER
Um... Sir... We seem to have a problem here

IGWT
Oh? Did I put the wrong amount or something?

WAITER
That's fine. Um... It's about your signature?

IGWT
What about it?

WAITER
Um... You signed the motto written on a coin. I'm sure it was a mistake

IGWT
Not!

WAITER
We require a name, sir.

IGWT
In God We Trust!

WAITER
I'm sure you do - we all do, sir. However, we need a real name

IGWT
That is my real name

(Manager joins him)

MANAGER
Is there a problem here?

IGWT
Your waiter won't accept my credit card!

MANAGER
That's right. I told him not to! Sir - we need a name. A real name! Not a political statement or something... In God We Trust cannot in any way be considered a name. So if you'll just show us some other piece of identification...

IGWT
All my identification has In God We Trust. Do you believe in God?

MANAGER
What's that have to do with anything?

IGWT
Well - do you?

MANAGER
My personal beliefs have nothing to do with the present situation at hand. How about paying with some cold cash, instead?

IGWT
See? It's your "who cares" attitude that could cause "In God We Trust" to be removed from our coins!

MANAGER
So you admit that's not your real name! I knew it!

IGWT
I beg your pardon! FYI - that IS my legal name! Here... I'll show you my driver's license...and my vehicle registration...

MANAGER
(reading pieces of identification)
Well, I thought I've seen it all! Forgive me sir. I was wrong and you're right! However, you must admit that this is a bit unusual

IGWT
Let's just say it's my own personal political statement

MANAGER
Fine with me. Now if you'll just sign the bill here... I can't seem to read your second name.

IGWT
E Pluribus Unum. Is there a problem?

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8. More Sopa

And on we go...

I combined a bunch of steps here because I was lazy and didn't feel like getting up and scanning for each one.



I added a wash of Transparent Brown Oxide over the bricks to tone them down a bit more.
I did those 4 windows up top with the same colors as the sky, since they're reflecting sky.
I did that little narrow band on top of the roof with a combination of Olive Green and a touch of Charcoal Grey.
I did the big windows with a combination of Charcoal Grey and Payne's Grey, with a little olive and some blues worked in for some variation, although they don't really show. I don't want to show any specific reflections here, so I just went with "dark". At this size, that works well, I've learned from experience.



I keep forgetting that bit to the right. I went back in and did the windows. In the photo it looks like that part is set back just a little bit, and also like there is a glass door there. So I made it look slightly different. I'll tone down this part some later on so it sets back a little.

I also added a light wash to the roof. In the photo its really washed out, and its difficult to tell what color it really is. So I made it pale blue grey, using the palette I already have going. I'll add the "stripes" to it later, maybe with pencil.

I also put a grey wash down at the bottom to establish the sidewalk and a bit of parking lot in front. I left the area where the plants are going to be blank.

OK, back to work!!!

All images are © Paula Pertile and may not be used or reproduced for any reason.

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9. Why Can't a Woman?

On Saturday March 1st at 1:00PM, I'll be at the Eric Carle Museum, moderating a panel discussion inspired by our earlier conversation about why women don't win the Caldecott Medal as often as they might. The panelists for "Read Roger Live" will include illustrator Jane Dyer, children's-books sexpert Robie Harris, Viking publisher Regina Hayes, and critic Leonard Marcus. I know the discussion will be lively, and the museum is beautiful, so come on over.

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10. I thought we were over this

But apparently not. Where I think listening to instead of reading a book-club selection might get you in trouble would be if another member challenged you to point out textual evidence for whatever point you were making. When the book under discussion is He's Just Not That Into You, however, maybe that problem doesn't come up.

Jon Scieszka discusses his wife's book club in the September Horn Book, saying that more often than not the book is peripheral to the discussion, which centers more on what's going on in the members' lives. What we used to call a kaffeeklatsch. And that's why guys tend to not like them. We tried one once at the Horn Book--the book was Sapphire's Push--and it was not very successful. I blame the book, though.

16 Comments on I thought we were over this, last added: 8/4/2007
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