How to use this Page

First of all, have you watched this yet? If not, do. Then we’ll talk:

Now here’s what I have to add to the topic of weight and body image and all that:

When I was quite a bit heavier than I am now, I went through Weight Watchers. And I’ll never forget what the instructor told us at one of the meetings: “Underwear isn’t supposed to hurt.” Changed my life, that statement. But maybe not for reasons the instructor would have expected.

She was trying to inspire us to reach our goal weights, and that was fine, as far as it went. But what it really said–to me, at least–was that we might not even realize we’re being mean to ourselves by wearing clothes that don’t fit us well. Maybe we’re so caught up in the idea of “these are the pants I’ll wear when I get down to X pounds,” we forget that we’re allowed to feel comfortable NOW, even before or while we work on losing weight.

Maybe some of you are like me, and you’re very good at being stern with yourselves. Being the drill sergeant, the disciplinarian, the one who makes up all the rules and then tries to come up with proper consequences when you violate them. So if you eat this cupcake, you’d better work out twice as hard tomorrow. Or my favorite at one time, the “bland days” that would follow a few days of unbridled eating. Then it was nothing but rice and vegetables or dry toast for me. Fun, huh? Really enjoying my life.

But I don’t do any of that anymore. Because I realized there’s no one making me be mean to myself but me. I’m a full-grown adult now, and I’m allowed to treat myself the way I would treat someone I love. I can’t imagine saying to my niece or to my best friend, “You ate half a bag of tortilla chips and a whole container of salsa this afternoon? Bad! You’re horrible! You’d better eat nothing but salads for the next five days!” Instead I’m sure I’d laugh it off, tell them I’ve done the same and more in times of stress (you have no idea how many cookies I sometimes need to get myself through the writing of some chapter that’s giving me fits), and then we’d go on talking about something far more important than whether her pants would be too tight tomorrow. Yes, they probably will. So what? Life goes on.

What I always found destructive in those times of self-criticism was the attitude of, “Oh, well, I’ve ruined it already. Might as well just keep eating everything in the world.” Uh, no. Might as well go do something sweet for myself instead, like take a hot bath or read a great book or pop in some rom-com DVD. Any of those take the place of chips or cookies–pure indulgence, meant only for me. Which means I’m also not allowed to criticize myself for goofing off. That’s right, I’m doing this right now. Because I’m allowed to be nice to myself.

I mentioned last week that I’m currently on a green smoothie kick, but let me be clear: It’s not a punishment of some kind. I’m doing it because I finally experienced what a proper green smoothie tastes like, I enjoyed it, I liked how it felt in my body, and so as a kindness to myself I’m going to drink some more. But if at any point I decide I don’t like the taste anymore or I don’t like that full feeling from having gobs and gobs of fruits and nuts and vegetables in what seems like a simple chocolate milkshake (by the way, I’ve been working on that recipe and have made it even better), then that’s it. No more. I’ll only do it if it feels nice.

That’s one of the pleasures of being an adult. A pleasure I wish I had learned back when I was a chubby teenager wearing clothing that hurt me every day, thinking it would motivate me to be skinnier. It didn’t. It just made me feel bad.

So I hope next time you pull on a pair of underwear with a waistband that cuts into your skin, you stop yourself and think, “Underwear isn’t supposed to hurt.” And that you take the next step by going to Target or wherever and buying yourself a package of underwear one size up. Or two sizes up, if you need to. Because that one simple thing might mean the difference between you feeling happy and comfortable in your body today, and you feeling miserable and guilty and unworthy. Such a simple fix. And believe me, you deserve it.

And the next time you go crazy eating something you’re sure you’re not supposed to eat, shrug it off. Do better tomorrow. Or do better starting a minute from now–the right path is always there waiting for you, whenever you feel like stepping back onto it. No worries, no punishment, no “bland days” or drill sergeant. The time to be sweet to yourself starts now.

It’s the kind of thing you can get used to.

Add a Comment

Maggie Goes On A Diet:

This book is about a 14 year old girl who goes on a diet and is transformed from being extremely overweight and insecure to a normal sized girl who becomes the school soccer star. Through time, exercise and hard work, Maggie becomes more and more confident and develops a positive self image.

This new release creates controvery with the word Diet. Will it lead to eating disorders, or help children understand the value of eating a healthy diet and exercising? While I haven't read the book, my first impression is that parts leave good messages; eating healthy, exercise. Another message, however, leaves me cold. In order to be popular and keep friends from bullying you, get thin and participate in team sports. The fact that Maggie loses weight and plays soccer is good, but this shouldn't be the only way to have friends. I'm also troubled that, apparently, the bullies have no accountability for their hurtful actions.

Not Fat Because I Wanna Be: By LaNiyah Bailey

The path that led 6-year-old LaNiyah Bailey to become a child author began with cruel taunts. LaNiyah Bailey said she was called “fat, fat-elephant and some kids told me I looked like I was having a baby and that I walked funny.
But LaNiyah wasn’t big because she was sitting on the couch all day eating cookies or french fries.

This book is written in first person about LaNiyah's struggle with bullies, doctors, and finally understanding her body. I haven't read this book, either, but the message seems like a good one, straight from LaNiyah.

No matter which book you choose, both have valid messages that should lead every school to provide education, along with a strong, anti-bullying mandate.

Maggie Goes On A Diet - Amazon

Not Fat Because I Wanna Be - Amazon

Add a Comment

by Dr. Dolgoff

The U.S. National Library of Medicine estimates that at least one out of five children in the U.S. is overweight. There are several reasons why parents need be concerned over an overweight or obese child. Obese children and adolescents have shown an alarming increase in the incidence of type 2 diabetes, also known as adult-onset diabetes. Many obese children have high cholesterol and blood pressure levels, which are risk factors for heart disease. One of the most severe problems for obese children is sleep apnea (interrupted breathing while sleeping). In some cases this can lead to problems with learning and memory. In addition, obese children have a high incidence of orthopedic problems, liver disease, and asthma.

How to determine if your child is overweight or obese:

A doctor is the best person to determine whether your child has a weight problem. Doctors will measure your child’s weight, height, age and growth patterns to determine if his or her weight is within a healthy range. Based on your child’s height and weight, they will calculate a body mass index (BMI). If your child’s BMI is greater than 95 percent of children their age and gender, they are considered to be overweight.

Why children become overweight:

Genetic factors: Children become overweight for a variety of reasons. The most common causes are genetic factors, lack of physical activity, unhealthy eating patterns, or a combination of these factors. In rare cases, a medical problem, such as an endocrine disorder, may cause a child to become overweight. A careful physical exam and some blood tests will determine if your child is overweight due to this type of problem.

Children whose parents or brothers or sisters are overweight may be at an increased risk of becoming overweight themselves. However, not all children with a family history of obesity will be overweight. Genetic factors play a role in increasing the likelihood that a child will be overweight, but shared family behaviors such as eating and activity habits also greatly influence body weight.

Lifestyle: A child’s total diet and his or her activity level both play an important role in determining a child’s weight. The average American child spends approximately 24 hours each week watching television - time that could be spent in some sort of physical activity.

What parents can do to help:

Be supportive: Overweight children need support, acceptance, and encouragement from their parents. Children’s feelings about themselves often are based on their parents’ feelings about them. It is also important to talk to your children about weight, allowing them to share their concerns with you.

Don't use food as a punishment or reward: Withholding food as a punishment may lead children to worry that they will not get enough food which may result in overeating. When foods, such as sweets, are used as a reward, children may assume that these foods are better or more valuable than other foods. For example, telling children that they will get dessert if they eat all of their vegetables sends the wrong message about vegetables.

Display Comments Add a Comment

I know Halloween is over, but I received these stats from Coupons Code and thought it was interesting.

New research from one of America’s leading coupon code and voucher sites has revealed that a quarter of American children under the age 12 are on a diet. Furthermore, a fifth of parents admitted that they wouldn’t allow their kid to go Trick-or-Treating for fear of them eating ‘too much candy’.

New research has shown that a quarter of American parents have put their kids aged 12 or under on a diet. A further 19% of parents polled said that they did not allow their children to go ‘Trick-or-Treating’ this Halloween for fear of them eating too much candy.

The poll was conducted by one of America’s leading coupon code sites, http://www.couponcodes4u.com/, which wanted to investigate the attitudes of parents towards the food that their kids eat. As result the site polled 6,523 American parents with kids aged 12 or under to find out their thoughts on the subject.

*  When the site asked the question “what food do your kids generally eat the most?” only 24% stated ‘healthy food’, while a further 58% said ‘junk food’.

*  A quarter of parents, 26%, admitted that their child is on a diet, while a further 11% said that that they were currently ‘watching what their child ate’. When CouponCodes4U.com asked them to stipulate their reason for their child being on a diet, 6% said their child’s pediatrician had recommended it.

*  A fifth of the parents asked said they wouldn’t allow their child to go Trick-or-Treating for fear of them ‘eating too much candy’, while 41% insisted on giving their child a packed lunch for school instead of letting them eat in the cafeteria. When asked ‘why?’ 62% of these parents said it was to ‘keep track’ of what their child was eating.

*  Despite the fact that 26% of the respondents said their child was on a diet, only 11% said they made sure their child was exercising regularly. On a similar note, 19% admitted to having previously given their child a note to allow them to skip gym class.

Mark Pearson, Chairman of CouponCodes4U.com, had the following to say about the study;

“With Halloween very close now, we wanted to find out if parents would prevent their kids from going Trick-or-Treating, for whatever reason. The study actually found that more parents were concerned about their child eating too much candy on the night than them being safe, which is quite surprising."


About Coupon Codes:

Coupon Codes are great way to save money when you shop online. Also known as promotional codes, e-coupons or discount codes, they are simply special codes which will get you a discount from the listed retail price of many goods, at a variety of different online USA stores.

Display Comments Add a Comment