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My comedic novel set in a pet shelter was unleashed upon the world last July.

Here's the good news. Reviews have been almost universally excellent - three and four stars on Amazon and Goodreads, and even a very nice one from the pros at Kirkus. So, great, right?

Well, not exactly. Truth is, I'm just not selling many books. Here's the dilemma, no doubt one faced by many self-published authors. I'm not reaching my audience. If the book had lousy reviews - or even no reviews - I'd give it up. But people LIKE it, and many absolutely LOVE it.

So I'm seeking help: I need some fresh ideas to market the book without bankrupting myself.

Before you start to make suggestions, I'm going to outline what I've done so far.

Social Media
Twitter: I've strategically acquired nearly 70,000 Twitter followers, most of whom are animal lovers and/or avid readers. I promote the book regularly on Twitter, and send new Twitter followers a welcome message containing a link to the book on Amazon. Plus, I engage my readers daily with witty, fun, thoughtful content. And Twitter, my friends, has been the sole successful effort to date. Nearly all my readers come to the book via Twitter. I definitely need to diversify, which I'm trying to do. Read on.

Facebook: Created separate Facebook page for the book, and post there as well as on my regular page.

Goodreads: Contacted top reviewers, mainly women, and requested reviews. A few did so, with mostly glowing reviews. Results: some sales, I guess. Not tons.

Amazon: The mother of them all. Like Goodreads, sent review requests to top reviewers who seemed a good fit. Again, received great reviews. Enough to generate business? Nah.

Pinterest: Have a bunch of followers there, and the book is part of my profile.


Women's interest e-newsletters

Sent the actual book or link to Amazon page to: Daily Candy, Pure Wow, Urban Daddy, Fab, Joyous, Hello Giggles (Zooey Deschanel's site) and Rookie. Guess the outcome.

eBook Reviewers

Sent review requests to People, Entertainment Weekly, Bustle and even The New York Times (now there's a waste of postage).

The Dodo

This is in a category all its own. I read in the NYTimes that founder of BuzzFeed was funding his daughter's new animal focused website The Dodo. So I sent said daughter a copy of the book, and The Dodo featured a story I wrote about my dog on the site, with a link to the book's Amazon page. Guess I sold a few extra copies the days the story was featured.

Bookstore Readings
Did readings at two local stores. Frankly, don't have time to pursue this further and doubt it would do much for me.

Blurb and PR requests
Sent copies of the paperback to around sixty celebrities who are known animal lovers (yes, including Ellen DeGeneres) and to chick-lit writers, asking them to write a blurb for the book - or even, in some cases, option it for the movies. Yes, I have delusions of grandeur. Result: I received a lovely, handwritten note from author Meg Cabot, informing me that she was no longer doing blurbs, but wishing me luck, and - TA DA - an envelope containing nothing but an autographed picture of Charlize Theron.

Charity Tie-In
I approached animal oriented charities - ASPCA, The Humane Society, PETA and the World Wildlife Fund - offering to donate to them a percentage of the profits from sales of the book if they would promote it on their websites. All turned me down, though PETA does have an online store where I can list the book for $500. I'm considering it.

Pet-oriented businesses
I sent copies of the book to PETCO, Petsmart and a few other national pet supply stores to see if they would carry the book. All declined. Also tried a few local independents - same result.

Vets' offices
I tried my local veterinarian's office,which is part of the VCA chain. They said they couldn't make the decision to carry the book, and that I would need to approach VCA's national headquarters. I did so, and contacted the other big veterinary chain, Banfield, as well. Never heard from them - and yes, I did make follow-up phone calls.

Pet-centric writers
Sent copies of the book to a few columnists who write about animals. Nada.

What I've considered and haven't done
Placed copies of the book on subway seats and airport waiting areas with a note asking finders to post reviews and/or spread the word any way they could in exchange for the free book. Any thoughts on this?

So, bottom line. I've done every free thing I can think of. Please share with me your ideas (whether more unpaid things or things I'd have to pay for) so that I can help my little baby find the audience it deserves. You can post here or email me at [email protected].

HUGE THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO READS THIS, BOUGHT ANIMAL CRACKER, OR MAKES A SUGGESTION.

Father’s Day is the perfect time for dads to spend some quality time with their kids. For dads with very young children, here are two books to enjoy together today or any other day:

Title: A Perfect Day by Remy Charlip
Reading level: Ages 4-8
Hardcover: 40 pages
Publisher: Greenwillow (April 24, 2007)
ISBN-10: 006051972X
ISBN-13: 978-0060519728

What could possibly be better than spending a day together?
Absolutely nothing.
Turn the pages.
Here is a perfect day.

This sweet book from writer Remy Charlip received a star review from School Library Journal.

Title: You Can Do Anything, Daddy - by Michael Rex
Reading level: Ages 4-8
Hardcover: 32 pages
Publisher: Putnam Juvenile (March 22, 2007)
ISBN-10: 0399242988
ISBN-13: 978-0399242984

If your dad is willing to save you from pirates, gorilla pirates, robot gorilla pirates and even robot gorilla pirates from Mars, you know he’ll do anything for you. And if that makes your dad hungry and thirsty or if he gets cuts and bruises, you know just how to take care of him right back. An adventurous tale of the heroic lengths fathers and sons will go for each other that will elicit gasps, giggles and warm contented sighs.

by Remy Charlip Greenwillow Press 2007 In very quiet rhymes Remy sets the scene. Mountain Valley Rising sun Time to wake Day has begun The sun is rising in the on the mountain while the night is still nestled in the valley. We move from the large to the small as a child and parent sit at breakfast and plot out their day. In luminous watercolor they move to a hike, gaze at the clouds, have

Here's one for the unaware-of-the-concept that crocodiles+available human=snack.

This definitely belongs in the people-unaware-of-the-end-result or he-should-have-known-better file.

So this man who is a zoo veterinarian no less indicating that he has experience with dangerous animals, enters the crocodile compound or cage or whatever and wherever crocs live, in Taiwan. According to the report he was in the crocodile's cage to give it an aenesthetic dart since it was sick, given the crocs propensity to bite without provocation. At the point where he was about to remove the tranquilizer dart and not noticing that it i.e. the croc, wasn't fully aenesthesised, the crocodile made its move biting off the man's fore-arm.

Again, it makes one (me) wonder how a person in his i.e. the veterinarian's situation could have missed this very important fact or reality.

Initial reports indicated that shots fired at the crocodile by a co-worker killed the beast however an updated report now claims that no bullet holes have been found in its hide.

Darn - there goes another crocodile purse! Seriously though...

According to a zoo worker the crocodile was shocked perhaps at the fact that it was a target and opened its mouth to let go of the arm. A video report shows the police officer firing at the animal to retrieve the arm.

Anyway...the bottom line to all of this is that the arm was rushed to the hospital where it was re-attached. Here is the "before" photo:

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,21543403-2,00.html

There is no report on how the crocodile is doing.